Hey BB, I hope you don’t mind me chiming in on the subject of guilt. If you ever want to understand guilt, observe a dog. By nature dogs and animals don’t feel guilt; they are what they are, and they don’t feel remorse for being that way. UNTIL, by domestication, we humans taught dogs to feel guilt. Or I should say “fear of repercussions”.
Say your dog eats your favorite boots. Does your dog feel guilty while you’re doing it? No, she’s having fun. Does your dog feel guilty after doing it? I doubt it. But when you come home and say “Snookie what have you done!” that’s when your dog feels “guilt”. Because Snookie is either afraid of being punished, or Snookie realizes that you are upset.
What I’m saying, and you spelled it out at 2:50
“You can’t help but think, like, what are they thinking about? How do they think of me? Do they think I’m a slut? It gave me a lot of anxiety.”
I submit that your anxiety is not guilt for any wrongdoing. It’s more like anxiety over what people around you are thinking about your actions, and what they might do or say. That’s a valid fear. People & rumors can hurt. But for what it’s worth, I don’t think you should feel guilty for anything you did. If anyone tries to make you feel guilty, they need to get over it. You chose your own actions, they seemed like a good idea at the time. No problem?
Hi Bri, I think you care a little too much about what your abusive ex thinks about you. My suggestion would be to find ways to just move on and put him out of your mind. Just focus on yourself, feeling better and finding someone new that you can develop a healthy caring relationship with. Might be a good idea to write your thoughts down as well so you can cover the key things you wanted to mention in your video. Cheers.
I was extremely tired when i decided to record. So it was all over the place I’m sorry. And I know i shouldn’t Worry what he thinks. I know i shouldn’t but its thing like that give me anxiety.
don’t know the exact situation, if you run with the same crowd and everyone knows your business that can bring on guilt, i avoid running with the same crowd, i really don’t run around with anyone anymore, by choice, but when i did i had friends but very few knew each other, if something happened it didn’t effect the whole enchilada, everyone has guilt, when you are around people and they make you feel guilty then don’t go around them, then your guilt will lesson, not saying you have anything to be guilty of.
Everyone knows everyone in this town it seems. So its hard to not get involved with people you don’t want to. Because they are more or likely friends with half you your friends.
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Hey BB, I hope you don’t mind me chiming in on the subject of guilt. If you ever want to understand guilt, observe a dog. By nature dogs and animals don’t feel guilt; they are what they are, and they don’t feel remorse for being that way. UNTIL, by domestication, we humans taught dogs to feel guilt. Or I should say “fear of repercussions”.
Say your dog eats your favorite boots. Does your dog feel guilty while you’re doing it? No, she’s having fun. Does your dog feel guilty after doing it? I doubt it. But when you come home and say “Snookie what have you done!” that’s when your dog feels “guilt”. Because Snookie is either afraid of being punished, or Snookie realizes that you are upset.
What I’m saying, and you spelled it out at 2:50
“You can’t help but think, like, what are they thinking about? How do they think of me? Do they think I’m a slut? It gave me a lot of anxiety.”
I submit that your anxiety is not guilt for any wrongdoing. It’s more like anxiety over what people around you are thinking about your actions, and what they might do or say. That’s a valid fear. People & rumors can hurt. But for what it’s worth, I don’t think you should feel guilty for anything you did. If anyone tries to make you feel guilty, they need to get over it. You chose your own actions, they seemed like a good idea at the time. No problem?
Thank you for the reply Salt. After reading that it made more sence. I love the example you gave me. It all has more clarity now. Thank you.
Hi Bri, I think you care a little too much about what your abusive ex thinks about you. My suggestion would be to find ways to just move on and put him out of your mind. Just focus on yourself, feeling better and finding someone new that you can develop a healthy caring relationship with. Might be a good idea to write your thoughts down as well so you can cover the key things you wanted to mention in your video. Cheers.
I was extremely tired when i decided to record. So it was all over the place I’m sorry. And I know i shouldn’t Worry what he thinks. I know i shouldn’t but its thing like that give me anxiety.
Hi Bri: Sometime relocated to a new city helps. It helped me.
I’m suppose to move out of Iowa within the next 2 years. It should help greatly. New faces, fresher start.
beaubri,
don’t know the exact situation, if you run with the same crowd and everyone knows your business that can bring on guilt, i avoid running with the same crowd, i really don’t run around with anyone anymore, by choice, but when i did i had friends but very few knew each other, if something happened it didn’t effect the whole enchilada, everyone has guilt, when you are around people and they make you feel guilty then don’t go around them, then your guilt will lesson, not saying you have anything to be guilty of.
Everyone knows everyone in this town it seems. So its hard to not get involved with people you don’t want to. Because they are more or likely friends with half you your friends.
beaubri,
oh i hate that! 🙁