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Truth

by thehusk

I’m a really shitty person. I don’t feel like I’m salvagable at this point. There isn’t a future version of me that should be able to be happy. Some people really should just die, and I feel like I’m one of them.

I don’t want to die. But it feels right, to a part of me. By continuing to live, I’m resisting the recognition of who I really am, and what should happen to me. I’m making the world worse, just by continuing to be in it.

The thought of a world without me in it is appealing, even though I wouldn’t be around to enjoy it. To not be this compromised, contaminated thing, trailing my self-inflicted misery behind me. To submit to my guilt, and stop living this lie. To conform to the emotional truth.

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2 comments

rocketman 12/21/2015 - 7:21 pm

thehusk,

you have every right to spread your sunshine like the rest of us. you belong here like everyone else.

thehusk 12/22/2015 - 1:49 am

Not much sunshine in me I’m afraid. Gets blocked out by all the crap. I belong in the ground.

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