Where? Where was God when the bastard my brothers call ‘dad’ was hurting me? Where was he when my brother’s hand was getting burned? When Mom was beating the shit out of me? When they took me from my brothers? When my best friend and Dad were dying? I don’t fucking know. I wish i did but I don’t. I wish I believed in him everyday. I wish Mom loved me. I wish I didn’t have these thoughts in my head. I wish so many things I can’t have. But most importantly… I wish i was dead, that i never existed. That Mom would have had a miscarriage so that I wouldn’t have ruined her life. I wish I had the courage to actually do it…someday I will. I just hope that someday is soon.
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The God That Failed- Metallica… To answer your question.
Sorry. Wish I had some advice or words of inspiration… I don’t. All I can think is you’re here now so… I dunno. As much as you been hurt, give a little back before you go… That’s probably bad advice. Fucking mood swings…
Fucking great song. Thank you.
It’s very often that I look at myself wishing I were dead and wondering why it’s not me wishing things were better SOMEhow. I’m sorry about what you’ve been through. If it’s worth anything, SOMEhow, you’re not alone.
I’m also having a hard time believing in a Christain I just don’t understand why he would let so much suffering happen to us