Im a new member and I discovered this website a few days back and I was reading through some posts and I was able to relate.
and yes I’m a cutter. the first time I did that was when I was 15 and now I’m 18
I’ve stopped cutting after a year and recently got back into it really badly. I know its not a good thing and I’m aware of it but it’s frustrating when you have no one to actually support you and know how you feel ( I don’t trust school counselors) no one in the family knows I’ve started again (this time I hid them)
the reason why I started doing this was mainly because of my mother and my built up feelings regarding university
In the past few years I’ve drifted away and my mother pushed me away. I’ve realized that she hated me. she called me a fat whore, a slut, worthless all those things. did you think it would motivate me? I didn’t but rather pushed me away.
dear mother, I love you but sadly you don’t. I’m leaving this god forsaken country and I won’t look back so bye and take good care of yourself
13 comments
Try to hold on I’m a cutter aswell I’m not sure it will help but u can have my email if u want to chat
aww thanks a bunch I really appreciate it 🙂 I’ve learnt to control it and don’t do as often as I used to but I did it last night I couldnt take it anymore and even today Im just reminded of all those incidents. Maybe we’ll end up helping each other? 🙂
I put my email up I think u have to wait for it to get allowed though I’m not sure
good to know 🙂
Indigojones5@gmail.com feel free to email me I cut today I did try yesterday but something weird happened
🙂 don’t worry we can help each other
Wow your mother sounds like a real peach. Yeah, leave, go far away and don’t look back. That is what I did and I never regretted it a day. She did though.
what?
I feel you. My mom screams and yells at me often and treated me the same way many times. I can relate. I am 30 yrs old right now and have been abused by her verbally and sometimes physically most of my life. I am still here. You know you are not what she calls you. You know better who you are and if you don’t you will.
The problem with my society is that people can’t distinguish between “discipline” and “abuse” which is a major problem. I don’t blame my mother, (perhaps Im contradicting myself) but at the end of the day I want her to support me and be there when I need her the most. In reality she isn’t and I’m graduating this year so I’m not getting the mental support. On top of that she’s constantly nagging about university and bombarding me with such negative thoughts
ugh that sucks about your mom, I’m really sorry.
I cut too, started when I was 14. I’m trying to quit now so I know how you feel, it’s so hard.
don’t be sorry 🙂 its fine I’m used to it lel
I did stop cutting myself in the middle but I started picking up a month ago and thats no good :/ I dont want my boyfriend to worry about me
I hope someday we can both find a good way to stop cutting and find happiness.