Fuck this shit can’t take it anymore I’m at my end

So I’ve been crying for the last hour overdon’t  the shit my brother threw at me all his words nasty bitter angry words… Saying I can’t do this can’t do that I’m not doing anything. Everything I do is wrong I’m never right I’m stupid never gonna get a job. Useless, worthless leach. I fucking stood up to him to some degree before the tears came rolling in I feel like clawing skin till it burns and bleeds I need to feel pain I want to feel pain.  But I feel nothing I feel empty cold and bitter I’m numb from his words.  I’m so weak for crying. What will it take for him to realise that I’m actually depressed he doesn’t believe I am he calls me an attention seeking *****. Might as well be dead before he realizes “Fuck what do you know oh well now time to put her in the ground” If things don’t change for the better I’m ending it on Friday…  Now some of you know I’m in a rehab unit so how will that work? Well I found out that the hair appointment I have is on Friday and my mom is aloud to take me out to go and get it done anyway I still have stuff to move to the unit and some of the stuff I have is my old self harm and suicide stash basically stuff I use to try and attempt my life. So yeah like I said if shit ain’t better by Friday I’m ending it… I’ve had enough I’m done only so much a person can take