Hey, whiskered-fish… I have a lot of faith in you. While I know things are rough right now, I also know that you have a good head on your shoulders. We’re here for you.
I understand that worry. It was a worry that I had for some time. I tried to set my own course and stay with it. There’s no doubt in my mind that you’ll be able to do the same.
I think deep down we are all a little scared that we will become our parents. In some ways we will, we do share a genetic foundation after all. Although, and this is an important determining factor, our environment and experiences vary and therefore our perception of our world is different so in some key ways we will be different too.
Personally (and I understand this may sound bad) I observe the good and bad habits and traits of my parents, compare to my own and then alter if necessary. Kind of like a litmus paper test. Our parents attempt to teach us lessons but we can also learn our own lessons from them.
Kat, the way you articulate yourself here screams intellect. I understand self doubt, I really do. If you portray yourself in the outside world the same as you do here you are sure to do well.
I don’t think that sounds bad at all. I think that’s smart.
I’ve only done that in two separate circumstances: 1) both of my parents grew up with a huge drug problem. I saw how much their addiction ruined their lives, and I decided not to touch ANYTHING. Even when everybody and their dog started experimenting with weed. Nope. No thank you. I don’t care if it’s harmless; I don’t trust myself.
2) my father tried pursuing a career in music. It failed terribly. He’s now very poor. Watching that happen to him convinced me NOT to pursue a career in art or in writing. I want to eat, and have a roof. My father is a brilliant man. An absolute genius. But he’s scraping by because of that one mistake.
Thanks. I really do appreciate your confidence in me.
I think we make a conscious decision about how we act and portray ourselves. I agree that there are important lessons to be learnt if we are observant. This doesn’t necessarily mean others and past decisions were a mistake at that time, even if the outcome was not desirable and retrospectively have proven to be a mistake. We simply have more information now than we did at that time to review decisions. Sometimes you also need to take a chance, risk and reward. Although, I believe your analytical decision making is wiser.
I felt like this when I was going to university.. Just so much stress and anger and sadness…. Especially after my transcript evaluation and I realize I was screwed out of all of my credits.
engineering…
It feels impossible for me to get back after the shitty year I’ve had.. Now I’m gonna fail this semester and fuck up any chance I have of even transferring so.. idk
Well, that’s good then. At least it was a useful major. I don’t have any useful skills. I’m going into veterinary medicine, but I’m not a math-oriented girl. So I think I’ll fail. Vet was the only “useful” occupation I could think of for myself.
Education is never a guarantee for a good life or a successful career. It’s only a tool. Few people manage to use it wisely enough to make good money out of it or survive the cannibalistic human battlefield. I mean, capitalism, amiright? Always put yourself and your health before education.
I’m worried too I’ll end up like my parents. Freud probably has a theory about that too. It’s normal to be afraid. I know it’s stuck in your head and makes you feel unsafe, but you gotta fight it. I hate it so much when I look in the mirror and I see myself as parts of their bodies put together like some kind of monster. It gives me fucking panic attacks. But then I remind myself I am my own person, I own myself, I belong to myself, I am me and nobody can ever change that.
It’s obvious you’re stressed out. Be kind to yourself. Eat your fav food once in a while, drink your fav kind of tea, watch a show you like… That’s what usually helps me to get my shit together.
Someone who tells you something like that is a jerk. I hate using that word to describe people but no other word seems to fit. Not only is it mean, but it’s also wrong. Prove them wrong. They should eat their words.
Veterinary medicine is a respectable major. There’s a need for people in your field… and for people like you. Please don’t let anybody tell you otherwise.
It’s not a contest as to who earns their keep more than others. Everyone has equally earned their keep. At seventeen, making a plan for your future can be difficult enough. You have made some professional goals. That’s respectable.
You have a lot of time. Study hard and prepare yourself for a career that involves a lot of work and is very rewarding at the same time. You will do it. I’m sure.
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Hey, whiskered-fish… I have a lot of faith in you. While I know things are rough right now, I also know that you have a good head on your shoulders. We’re here for you.
Thanks, distant road. I’m just so worried about ending up like my parents.
I understand that worry. It was a worry that I had for some time. I tried to set my own course and stay with it. There’s no doubt in my mind that you’ll be able to do the same.
Thanks. I hope you’re right.
I think deep down we are all a little scared that we will become our parents. In some ways we will, we do share a genetic foundation after all. Although, and this is an important determining factor, our environment and experiences vary and therefore our perception of our world is different so in some key ways we will be different too.
Personally (and I understand this may sound bad) I observe the good and bad habits and traits of my parents, compare to my own and then alter if necessary. Kind of like a litmus paper test. Our parents attempt to teach us lessons but we can also learn our own lessons from them.
Kat, the way you articulate yourself here screams intellect. I understand self doubt, I really do. If you portray yourself in the outside world the same as you do here you are sure to do well.
I don’t think that sounds bad at all. I think that’s smart.
I’ve only done that in two separate circumstances: 1) both of my parents grew up with a huge drug problem. I saw how much their addiction ruined their lives, and I decided not to touch ANYTHING. Even when everybody and their dog started experimenting with weed. Nope. No thank you. I don’t care if it’s harmless; I don’t trust myself.
2) my father tried pursuing a career in music. It failed terribly. He’s now very poor. Watching that happen to him convinced me NOT to pursue a career in art or in writing. I want to eat, and have a roof. My father is a brilliant man. An absolute genius. But he’s scraping by because of that one mistake.
Thanks. I really do appreciate your confidence in me.
I think we make a conscious decision about how we act and portray ourselves. I agree that there are important lessons to be learnt if we are observant. This doesn’t necessarily mean others and past decisions were a mistake at that time, even if the outcome was not desirable and retrospectively have proven to be a mistake. We simply have more information now than we did at that time to review decisions. Sometimes you also need to take a chance, risk and reward. Although, I believe your analytical decision making is wiser.
Ignore the part about mistakes, I was trying to justify making mistakes….
We are probably better off excepting we are human and fallible.
Thanks. You’ve got a point, there, don’t you?
I felt like this when I was going to university.. Just so much stress and anger and sadness…. Especially after my transcript evaluation and I realize I was screwed out of all of my credits.
I’m so sorry that that happened. What was your major?
engineering…
It feels impossible for me to get back after the shitty year I’ve had.. Now I’m gonna fail this semester and fuck up any chance I have of even transferring so.. idk
I’m sorry about how you’re feeling, fishy. *hugs*
Well, that’s good then. At least it was a useful major. I don’t have any useful skills. I’m going into veterinary medicine, but I’m not a math-oriented girl. So I think I’ll fail. Vet was the only “useful” occupation I could think of for myself.
Education is never a guarantee for a good life or a successful career. It’s only a tool. Few people manage to use it wisely enough to make good money out of it or survive the cannibalistic human battlefield. I mean, capitalism, amiright? Always put yourself and your health before education.
I’m worried too I’ll end up like my parents. Freud probably has a theory about that too. It’s normal to be afraid. I know it’s stuck in your head and makes you feel unsafe, but you gotta fight it. I hate it so much when I look in the mirror and I see myself as parts of their bodies put together like some kind of monster. It gives me fucking panic attacks. But then I remind myself I am my own person, I own myself, I belong to myself, I am me and nobody can ever change that.
It’s obvious you’re stressed out. Be kind to yourself. Eat your fav food once in a while, drink your fav kind of tea, watch a show you like… That’s what usually helps me to get my shit together.
Thanks, man. For all you said. What you said about looking in the mirror was pretty heavy.
I’ll try to be kind to myself. Although it won’t involve any food. And it will be very hard.
Someone I barely know just told me that I probably shouldn’t have been born. Well, fuck. If strangers can see it then it must be right.
I mean, my mother would’ve surely had a much brighter future had she aborted me, like she did the first one.
Someone who tells you something like that is a jerk. I hate using that word to describe people but no other word seems to fit. Not only is it mean, but it’s also wrong. Prove them wrong. They should eat their words.
Veterinary medicine is a respectable major. There’s a need for people in your field… and for people like you. Please don’t let anybody tell you otherwise.
Thanks, distant road. They’re probably right though. What have I ever done that justifies my gluttonous use of air, food, water?
Maybe I’ll be able to earn my keep one day. I mean, I’m only seventeen. I have time. I think.
It’s not a contest as to who earns their keep more than others. Everyone has equally earned their keep. At seventeen, making a plan for your future can be difficult enough. You have made some professional goals. That’s respectable.
You have a lot of time. Study hard and prepare yourself for a career that involves a lot of work and is very rewarding at the same time. You will do it. I’m sure.
Thank you. I appreciate that.
I nearly failed school.. You wont be homeless Kat.. The very least i can offer you is a place to stay if that ever happens.
Please be okay.. I’m here always
Thanks. I can’t take that offer though, because I’d never be able to bear that. I already feel like a burden in my own house, and I’m still a minor.
But again, thanks. I appreciate your kindness.
I wish I could tell you that I’m doing better today, but I’m not.