Uh, hi. I’m new to this site and found it while I was in a dark mood. I just feel like this place might be safe for me to open up a bit and let things out.
I’m nineteen, about to be a junior in college, and have been suffering from anxiety and depression most of my life. I’m diagnosed with anxiety and positive I have depression and a form of PTSD. I’m on medication for my anxiety but I’m afraid that it might not be working or having odd side affects on me recently. I’ve taken this medication for about a year now and recently upped the dose just last week or so, but my depression and anxiety have only gotten worse. My doctor said that if the medication wasn’t doing any harm before, a slightly higher dose shouldn’t do anything. Though, within the past week, I’ve broken down twice and cut once.
Oddly enough I don’t feel too stressed, maybe slightly but nothing overwhelming. Most of my issues are forming around the friendships I’ve encountered. I wouldn’t say that they are bad people, they most certainly aren’t, but I have been getting wary when talking or being myself when around them. My form of anxiety is mostly social anxiety, so I attributed it to that, but it’s gotten to the point where I feel as though if I make any sort of connection at all I will end up breaking. I’m starting to become scared. I hate being alone but I also hate being around people- sometimes I hate people in general. I just… I don’t know…. I feel like I’m being overwhelmed by a force I can’t control.
1 comment
welcome ^_^