Yesterday was a pretty good day…last night and today, I’m right back down to where I was. I can’t stand the pain of the unknown, the up and down feelings, the frustration of not knowing where my relationship is going, hell, I don’t even know where it’s at. My relationship is what keeps our family together, my family is falling apart now. She tells me I’m making it out to be more that what it really is but I know I am worthless now, no ambition left and no desire to see the next day. I’ve ruined us and she will never love me again like she did before. I truly cannot do life without her in it as she’s all I have left. My path of self destruction is coming to an end, there’s no left nor right turn, just a stop. I can’t turn around and fix everything that has happened. I can’t make her feel like it’s okay, she’s almost gone from me and I have no desire to go forward in life, the pain is overwhelming and my love for her is stronger than ever, but here I am. Every day the pain gets stronger and stronger.
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3 comments
These ups and downs are quite common to me as well. Still haven’t figured out how to deal with them. Can’t have one full day being ok.
That’s exactly it, most days are down…I can’t stand the extreme 🙁
Yesterday I didn’t feel like i’m in this life alone, today, right back at it