I’m still here… Quietly dying

I’m still here sadly, the girl I love hates me, my family I chose has turned against me, my very existence is just one big lie. I’m not able to eat, I’m not able to feel, my heart and mind are at peace because I’ve come to accept that I shall die in a fire fit for a Viking or I shall die from a bullet through my skull. Which one is the suicide? Which one is the homicide? In truth, it’s all suicide and the homicide is simply to get someone to help me break my promise I made all those year so ago. So I say, I’m still here quietly dying.