I am feeling constantly restless like I’m trapped in my own body, and my soul is screaming silently from within.
Another way to explain it is like im trapped in a box that is slowly filling with water and it’s already passed my head and now I’m fighting to take a breath at the top.
The worst thing this is while this internal struggle is taking place as I have to sit around with my family and have to act like there is nothing wrong to stop them suspecting anything about my future plans or that I am unraveling within.
Anyone have any tips on how to deal with or keep these feelings hidden as I don’t know if I can hide it for much longer.
2 comments
I exactly feel the same. The only sall difference is i feeel trapped in a box totally filled with shit instead of water. I’m drowning in the awful stinking mess i made o my life, the mess i caused in the lifes of others.
You ask for tips, i think it’s qutie complicated. For me feelings this means i’m on my way to hell, and my soul is trying to push me over the limit into the eeternal deserved punishment. If you see more light, yu can try to be saved by god if you believe in that, or try to close your feelings live with the day and if you also believe in hell… theres no punishment you can give yourself that will be 10% of what hell is. So if you can find the strenght you can try to be just happy in this lie and do what yo want, because it doesn’t matter annymoe if you do good or bad things when you eel hell is waiting or you. But ofr me, those “tips” didn’t work. I disgust myself and everythign i did, i even don’t want to be saved nnymoe because hell is absolutely what i deserve and what i “want” to end up in. If you liek to talk please mail me: stefan at deds.nl
I wrote my email addres in a diferent way but it is: stefan@deds.nl i realy hope we can talk.