I have given up.
My parents are wasting money away with my goddamn pills and therapy. But I’m not getting better. I’ve been on medication for almost a month and I’m not getting better. Nothing is. In fact I’m falling apart. And everyone ignores this, my parents don’t want to even talk about anything related to my mental health issues.
I feel like such a burden. I am exhausted all day, I can’t eat as much as I used to years ago, every day is a struggle and I can’t concentrate on school or the things I loved anymore.
I’m so tired. I’m sorry to everyone who had to meet me.
This thursday and Friday I’ll be alone at home. I have everything ready. Unlike last year, I won’t fail this time.
I have given up. I’m not strong enough for this world and its expectations.
9 comments
You and me both. Sucks to feel like a burden, worst feeling in the world. I could literally sleep all day if I tried. My energy level is flat lined anymore. I’m torn between a gun or a highrise.
It sucks to see you are going through the same darling…it’ll be fine soon. Please try to hold on for a little longer, at least?
I could say the same about you, that it will be fine soon. The problem is neither of us really know if it will ever get better. I don’t see it ever getting better until I finish myself off.
Your lucky. I wish I could sleep all day
I know how you feel. I’ve given up as well and preparing for my suicide this month.
I’m just curious, how old are you? Maybe you should reconsider if you are too young
@John Doe I’m 15 but I cannot do this anymore. I tried for years and it’s not working.
You’re 15? Most of us here are already adults. We’ve already failed our lives and have to start over. You haven’t even begun, you have so many opportunities that many of us would probably bleed others for. There is an entire grading system in school for you to beat. Once you do that you can do anything you want in the world, anything at all that it never ceases to amaze me just to think about it over and over again.
I want to go back to college, I’m 19. You go back to your youth, wallow over there and contemplate the lives of everyone in the street you see instead of wallowing here. You have the power, the chance now and for 2 years to decide whether you want to use your youth now to make your life a living bliss. There are SO MANY people for you to meet in your future that you will LOVE!!!
Heh. It’s nice to see I’m not alone with pretty much no energy left to do anything. Though no one around me knows about my depression, all the other crap and my constant suicidal thoughts. I try to keep it buried. And I don’t take any medication. Though maybe sleeping pills would be nice. Insomnia is pretty crappy. At least you had the energy to write this. I can’t even finish writing the post about my story. And I also have no energy for school work… Let alone getting to school. I haven’t gone for 2 weeks. I always mean to go… But I end up too tired in the morning that there is no point in going. Because I won’t be able to get anything done. I don’t even know if I’d have any energy left to get back home. I live kinda far from my school. I’m just waiting now until my body is too exhausted to even keep itself alive or when I finally manage to convince myself to something. What ever happens. I wish you luck.
You said you have been taking meds for almost a month, you have to give it more time than that. It takes several weeks for antidepressants to have much effect. Or you might need a different medication or a higher dose. I hate when people talk about being a burden or all the money being wasted on them. As if money is more important than they are.
Pretty much all the things you describe lack of focus/concentration, lack of appetite, lack of energy, sleeping all day. Those are all symptoms of depression. I imagine you already know that though. You should try and give the therapy and medication more time.