I Hate

I hate being the oldest of four brothers. I love my family, but I hate being the oldest. I have so much expectations, responsibilitied, I have to set the fucking example, and I am pathetic. I hate being who I fucking am. You would thing the oldest woild help at the little bros, give them advice, and put them on the right path. I can’t even do that shit for myself! Instead I am the one that my brother helps out, gives advice to, and feels bad for. I hate being the fucking one with “mental illness” in the fucking family. I hate being the one that “you should watch your words around.” I hate being the fucking black sheep. I hate being alone, and I hate fucking everything.