Everything started in begining of high school 2011, I meet a girl. She was really nice and sweet to me, I always hide the fact that I was lesbian. But this girl make me feel like I could be myself. We begin has friends, next thing I know we became something more.
One or two years was are realationchip, untill on my 16 birthday I found out she was cheating me with my best friend. I forgave her, I started 12 grade she was transferred to another school but we got engaged. Next thing i know she was engaged to my ex friend as well so i broke up with her completely. My heart has in broken pices.
But this other girl who was like a little sister to me, was there when I need it the most. I fall in love again. We started something, next thing I know my dad got shot he was a police. My world cracked, he was not just my father he was my best friend. My companion, we shared everythinf and i lost him for ever. I was living with him because I had some problems with my mother.
I was in depression and my dad’s death made me get worse. I moved back to my mother. They called me children services to take me way because someone knew I was trying to kill myself. I took terapy, I had a knew girlfriend. Everything was going a little well.
Until my ex sarted flirting with my girlfriend, I fight with her and she posted some pictures of me in a fake facebook of me. She send friend request to my hole family, friends and teachers. This happend when i graduated 12 grade.
Again my world colapes, my mom took everything away. I felt like a prisoner 24/7 being watch. I lost contact with a lot of people exept my girlfriend that I had to talk to her on my mothers backs.
Thats when I realize I had to disapper.
I went to college in another country, away of everyone I knew and changed my hair and clothe even change my name.
I found knew friends they knew what happend to me and they still loved me but one by one they finished college I end up alone again.
Since i was so far away I begin to have problems with my girlfriend from 2 years of relationship. We faught most of the times, the only way I could talk to her was in the library and sometimes will I was talking and fighting with her I was crying. Cleaning my tears hoping that nobody saw me. My love for her was faiding. I broke her heart.
I wont forgive myself for that. She diserved someone better than me.
Then she found me, she was taking care of me from far away. She allways saw me crying in the library and make sure I took the bus to go back home. She was my best friend but I was scared she will go back to her girlfriend.
One day I got drunk and told her I loved her, I told her to forget it. She couldnt take anymore she took me to a place and confess her feelings for me with tears in her eyes. I couldnt anymore and accept her. That day I lived again. She became my knew world. My family got crazy in loved with her. Evetrything was perfect for a year. Until one May, my mom and I got into a really ugly fight, I end up living with my girlfriend. I cry for weeks because I will never see my littlebrother and sister again. But my realationship with my family its getting better know, and living with my girlfriend is great.
But there are things still in our way, and im scaerd that its gonna end. And it will be my fault. A lot of things happen and I still have some heavy chains with me. I just hope I dont ruin this life.
2 comments
It seems like you’ve been accomplishing a lot lately. Your relationship with your girlfriend is growing and you’re getting back into your family. It takes a lot of effort but it’s worth it. I hope these things continue for you. You won’t ruin this life. Things are getting better.
Thanks it means a lot.
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It’s that things are going so well its scary sometimes. Like if everything was a dream. Also a lot of people depend on my girlfriend and sometimes I get a little jeolus and I don’t wanna tell her because she’s gonna feel bad. I just have to take those bad things in my head and take big breaths.