I try. I really do

I’ve seen so many people, visited so many hospitals, tried so many rx combos, gotten so many different diagnoses and just none of it honestly helps and there is very little tethering me to this planet anymore and I just wish it could be in my hands to decide to let go. No matter where I go or what people say to me to convince me otherwise, I’m left feeling like a stranger on the fringes everywhere I go. I’m alone. I’m deeply unhappy no matter how much I try to change it. And I try so hard