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My Story With Suicide

by catastroph.e_101

Hi guys, my name is Bianca and this is a story of my struggles with anxiety, depression, bipolar, anorexia, and then SUICIDE. when i was 6 my parents abandoned me at the doorstep of a strangers house. The last thing they said to me was that they hated me… That i was a mistake… that i was a disappointment… then they drove away. the people  who owned the house saw and heard the whole thing and took me inside. I lived with them for 3 weeks then the put me in the hands of social services to find me a forever home. I stopped eating, i never talked, i couldn’t smile or laugh. because of that i was put in a mental hospital to see if they could cure me. I started cutting at the age of 9… i had already given up on life. i attempted suicide for the first time when i was 11,and then twice when i was 13.  it hurt so much… i wanted to die so badly but i kept getting found. i am now 14 and cutting but i can talk now and i am undergoing therapy and counselling. i have been in 24 foster homes and am still moving but i have stayed in one place now for 5 months (its the longest i have stayed in one place) and i hope that this one is the last one.this is a perfect description of what it feels likethis is so truei would choose pill 2 and pill 8pill 2 and pill 8

my arm but with 3x as much now

3x more now

3 comments
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3 comments

sentido kumon 6/5/2019 - 8:04 am

That’s awful… just acknowledging the sh!t that this universe throws at some of us. I must say though, you’re very young to end your life Miss Bianca. Unfortunately, I have no answers for you, imo, nobody for that matter can give you answers except you. I truly hope that eventually you’ll find it in yourself (or maybe find someone or something) that will give you some sort of direction. Hang tough child.

catastroph.e_101 6/11/2019 - 6:00 pm

thank you. im crying just thinking that someone actually cares whether i live or die. Thank you soo much

Melancolia 6/27/2019 - 1:54 pm

Bianca, I am so sorry that you had to experience such pain so young. I hope that you can find a permanent place, you are still so young and someone like you shouldn’t had to feel the way you do. It truly breaks my heart just reading your story… You deserve better!

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