If our “loved ones” really cared?

If our “loved ones” really cared? Where are they? I can’t do it because my loved ones would be hurt, oh really? If they love you so much why are they not aware of your pain. Mine know and they still don’t give a fnck! We’re all programed to believe they’d be at a loss. I call “Bullshit!” After week has gone by, maybe a month at the least, they’ve moved on with their sick and selfish lives. This world is just full of contempt, a day late, a dollar short. If only we’d known… Hello!

I’m so fncking over it all. Chronic pain and illness is just taking its toll. I just wish I had the courage of the character in Paddelton on Netflix… Such courage! He just says I’m ready and drinks it down. No more of this insane world, body or dysfunctional relationships that just seem to permeate everyone in our civilization that’s not so very civilized. God, I have faith that you’ll give me the strength to lift the poison to my lips and gulp it down like the spiritual warrior, trusted servant of self love that I’ve made myself out to be… But really I’m just a wore out soul that’s tired beyond belief. I feel like road kill that is being dragged to its last breath…PERIOD End of Story!