I’m tired.
I was always tired but he just shoved me at the end.
I’m drained, all the good I use to see is gone.
People are cruel I know, but really acknowledging it is different.
He roams around around with all my secrets & has no care to share. Even those that only I know
I should have known better, I know better.
And those who should be on my side are calling dramatic. I can be dramatic but this is outrage.
How can those close be friends with this person?
Knowing what they know of what he did to me?
And thinking it’s ok to bring him around like nothing.
Time and time again I become a stupid person letting people in that seem genuine until they break a piece.
This one though broke me differently, that I lost myself I can’t find myself, I can’t recognize myself.
Now I’m acknowledging every experience and realizing I should’ve broken down long ago. If only my family knew about all the trauma they wouldn’t call me weird or trying to force relationships down my throat. Men terrify me, because of everything. But if they knew they would look down at me I know they would and I cannot bare that.
So I’m left with this sinkhole. That this person created, taking the last of hope and peace I had.
I’m just tired.
I’m so fucking tired.
I’m sure this world is done with me. Maybe.
4 comments
So was this guy a bf that put you down? Are you a teenager or at least 18? Because if u are over that age, I don’t think ur parents could control who they want you to date. I wouldn’t even bother with a relationship at the moment. I would focus more on you because u matter more than that guy. People will friend with others you don’t like. Maybe they haven’t seen the real him. Still, I would put all your focus on yourself. Do something you like to do. No one else. Whatever hobbies you have. Best of luck to you.
Over 18, probably just worded it wrong but anyway more so then being concerned of me not dating. I don’t really go into detail about it when they ask or my family asks I kind just shut down the conversation. Thought of seeing a therapist really not seeing anyone not like that’s any different just the typical of hobbie of writing seem to help more than anything right now. And thank u
Oh okay, yeah I don’t think you should have to date. Just do the things that make you happy. People in general can be really crappy. Both men and women. Anyway, you’re free to email me if u need someone to talk to. I have a lot of free time, so feel free if you want: morganb58@yahoo.com
“How can those close be friends with this person?
Knowing what they know of what he did to me?
And thinking it’s ok to bring him around like nothing.”
What the fuck. I hate this kind of shit.