I am completely ill-spirited because of a very dumb reason lately. I have gained weight this year. After my anti-depressant I gained 7 kg and it kept going up, because I tried to compensate a lot of crap through eating.
It’s not that I am in a bad situation currently, because I study from home and I am so happy when I don’t need to make myself go in front of the door. However I have tried to get some exercise in, by shopping for clothes, ’cause well.. most things don’t fit anymore.
I am a 25-year old male still wearing things from highschool, because frankly I could never afford it and trying on clothes has always been a struggle. I have been outside 3 times to different malls and I haven’t found a single piece. 40 bucks for pants? Yeah, no thanks. I could probably spend that much, but frugality has always been a big thing for me, due to the way I was raised.
It’s gotten to the point, that I cannot enjoy simple things in life anymore. Like sitting in a café? Gives me anxiety. Going to a restaurant? Nope, I will just spend my time calculating in my head over rather mediocre food.
Back to the point.. I currently have one pair of pants that fit me. And I truly don’t mind weighing more. The problem is the clothes. Let’s just say, there’s nothing in my closet I am even trying to fit in, I was trying to get rid of most of it a long time ago. It makes me so insecure that I even want to leave my home less. I don’t know what to do anymore. My friend says to order online but oh god, as if anything will fit. I can’t exactly eye it like I do in the store. I’ll probably have to send back an endless amount of packages.
I have been on a waiting list for a proper diagnosis in a hospital for a hecka long time. I just can’t do it anymore. It’s even gotten so bad, that I fail to study and I’m scared my funding will go away and I’m disappointing my job coach.
2 comments
depending on the type of pants, it’s hard to find good pants for me. I tend to actually spend between 40-50 per pair, but that’s specifically for pants constructed better. I can’t buy clothes from local stores, because it’s good for a few years and falls apart. Most of the good stuff is industrial grade, for example certified Flame Resistant seems to be a standard for good stuff. Also ripstop fabric, I’m a big fan.
You’re still relatively young, weight tends to shift in areas over time. Also, still relatively realistic to lose weight, if you want to anyway.
I don’t even know what I weigh anymore. People ask and I have to guess, because keeping a working scale is something I don’t seem to have the energy to do. The clothes I buy are almost always a size too big, because with shirts it just makes them hang looser and with pants I wear suspenders, so as long as I don’t overtighten them it isn’t an issue.
Thank you for replying, I’m in such a rut. I am now going to try on whatever I like and worry about the price later. Better to have 2-3 good pants that cost a bit more, than to have something out of place.
I’m thinking the losing weight part is more an option when I’m starting something else. Being at home kinda makes it hard. So I feel ya there. Hah, I used to wear suspenders when I was younger! Maybe it’s time to look for some again.