I woke up this morning, crying after a nightmare where my fiance was murdered. I wish I didn’t have to get out of bed.
Last night, after I published that post saying that my boyfriend said he’d take care of me in my time of need….he confessed something to me: that he has been suicidal on and off since he was ten, and that he really needed to burn himself (his form of self-harm). I ended up getting pissed off that he was pulling this on a day(night) where I needed him more than usual.
Today, with a few bumps in the road, I tried my best to be nice to him. When I walked out of my house this morning to leave for school, he was there, looking pathetic. As usual, I silently took him into my arms and he cried and apologized. This is not new behavior…
Tonight, I might cut myself. It’s a fifty-fifty chance…He’d see it tomorrow, we plan on getting intimate…But he burned last week…eye for an eye.
1 comment
Well I must say that from my (outsider’s) perspective that you two sound like a good couple. Seriously you have honesty there, you both admit your difficulties to each other. You two got something special and I for one am happy for you.