What to do?

I have been so pissed off all day and i’m not over exaggerating. Im getting sick and tired of people using me, abusing me, and making me feel like nothing and im sorry.. yea.. im sorry. im just gonna like.. emotionally detatch myself from everything. you know, my depression is getting bad again. I am regressing into a deeper depression than i was before. and i can feel it not only in my mind but in my heart.. and its killing me. my meds are making me crzy… and .. i just dont know anymore.I wanted to try and be happy but everything just keeps making it worse no matter my attempts. i have no idea what to do. im just terrible at talking.i feel like i fuck everything up.. sometimes when i try to say what i mean it comes out wrong.. and when i want to or actually need to say how i feel its just like… lkalkajsdlfjjijek.. <— yea.. i can't talk to my family about my problems because theyll just send me back to therapy and thats not a good idea.i just wanna be happy.