Considering that i never chose to be in this world why can’t i cease to exist? Why can’t i chose to leave? People say that you should think about death and where your soul will go. That there is a heaven and a hell. But that’s so unfair. I never chose to be here in the first place so why should i not be able to choose to be gone…forever…from any existence at all. When i die i want it to be as if i was NEVER created at all. I don’t want to continue in an afterlife. I’m so so so tired. Sleep used to be a welcome relief but now the nightmares and the heartache just fill my mind and wake me in an anxious panic.  Sleep is restless, disturbing, suffocating, heart wrenching, and cruel. I feel so empty and numb. I can’t seem to find any reason to stay. I don’t want to be here anymore. I want to be dead to any form of existence.
People say God would never give you more than you can handle. Then why do people commit suicide? Because they reached the point of not being able to handle anymore… Where was God then?
2 comments
Well the truth is you can cease to exist if you want that bad enough. Lots of people end their lives. As far as life after death I do believe in that but that is just my belief I cant prove anything.
if your worried about that kind of thing you might want to talk to a spiritual adviser.
and YES I agree with your statement about God never giving you more than you can handle > that has been pretty much been bullshit in my life. many times I have had more then I can deal with.
Im not sure I believe everything in the Bible anymore
The point of free will is that you can make mistakes and wrong decisions and you have to bear the consequences. You can always choose between the good and righteous and the bad and immoral. Unfortunately most of the time it is not clear which option is the right and which one is wrong.
I know I am in my situation because I made too many mistakes in my life (and most people who blame others probably should think about blaming themselves once in a while).
What you are referring to is called Theodicy, you might want to read something about it. The Book of Job is a good lecture as well.