Are there alternative versions of me out there in the multiverse? Ones that are sleeping contentedly in this moment, without this gaping hole inside? Ones that did some of the things I wish I’d done, and avoided the things I wish I hadn’t?
I need some way to hack into those alternate realities, and transplant myself into one. Any mad/genius scientists who happen to be reading and have a plan, I volunteer. God, to just wake up and find it was all a bad dream! That I wasn’t this pathetic isolated emotional cripple. To not be this insanely alone anymore.
Of course the simpler solution would be to put myself out of my misery, and leave my happy doppelgangers to enjoy their lives. But that would require the ability to let go of this self, which I clearly don’t possess.
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Sending compassion and hope that you will gather all those fragments of the soul and be whole once again.
my current thinking is that somewhere out there is a version of me without the high pain threshold, and also without the sensitivity to chaos. My thinking is the other me probably played baseball in middle and highschool, from what I can tell people that play sports don’t have time to ruminate, which was of course the root of my antipathy towards the society around me.
After high school, would have joined ROTC [I really am quite attracted to structures centered on discipline], done a degree in electrical engineering, joined the Navy, served my six to pay off my debt, move into the private sector, get married, start popping out kids, and it would only be in my mid 50s when I become an empty nester do I start to realize that I have been entirely manipulated by a system with less care for me than for the traditions it venerates.
*Forced smile* Thanks but no thanks, I despise that path. I knew it was there back then, and I didn’t go.
Feeling the Rick & Morty theme; I had to wait until I was certain. It had to be to the point that there was no way for me to earn an income and keep my ethics, and that took me 16 years of working. Now, realizing the futility, I’m still young enough to do something else. Artistic maybe, I have no intention of being good, but I think I could manage likable, and the arts always has room for that personality.
I recently rewatched one of my favorite movies, Harvey. Regardless of if you’ve seen it, one quote sticks with me;
“Years ago my mother used to say to me, she’d say, “In this world, Elwood, you must be” – she always called me Elwood – “In this world, Elwood, you must be oh so smart or oh so pleasant.” Well, for years I was smart. I recommend pleasant. You may quote me. ”
Of course my own mother never had any such wisdom to share, but I very much connect with the loveable outcast role, perhaps the only one I feel like trying to fit in.
Sounds like you might still end up as one of the more content versions of yourself. Hope it works out for you.
Yes I’ve considered that idea. Right now we don’t really know, there might be a multiverse and versions of us that are doing better or worse.
I recall thinking as a walked away on one beautiful moonlight night years ago, from one of the hottest girls I’ve met in my life and had a great rapport, that in another universe I had the nerve to ask her out and maybe wife her if I could’ve. They say don’t live with regrets, they were right, I had nothing to lose.
It’s times like that you just want to shoot yourself in the head, firstly for being stupid and passing up on a chance like that, but secondly because you know, while you’ll meet/date other attractive girls, you’ll probably never get someone who’s quite as unique and as stunning as her, so life feels pretty pointless after.
But yes, I have wished another me could give me advice from an alternate realm or help in other ways….but until we can travel or communicate across dimensions or universes or be something like the tv show Sliders, it’s all just fantasy.
The takeaway from that, for me, is that I have to make this life the best it can be and jump at any opportunity thrown at me. Too bad I learned all these lessons when I got too old to use them.
According to the Many Worlds Interpretation, quite possibly yes.
From that perspective, the “randomness” that seems to be a cornerstone of nature is in fact a splitting of the universe to accommodate\explore all “physically” possible results of a given quantum interaction.
Each branch differs from its ancestor by having a determined result for a quantum interaction which is undecided in the ancestor (“in a superposition”), and differs from its siblings by having a different determined result for this one interaction then in the other siblings.
Question is, do all the possible versions of “you”, in the different branches, actually have the light on? Are they conscious beings? Are they philosophical zombies in a “dead end” universe?
Perhaps you are “you” in this particular branch because… Reasons. And your alternative versions are even worse off in some way, according to those same Reasons, so that’s why “you” are here, rather than in any other branch.
There is some comfort in this line of thinking, in a way that shares a lot with certain religious views.
What if all of them have the lights on? They are each just as conscious as “you” are, just experiencing different realities.
In that case… If you had a way to permanently swap places with one of them, would you?
Would you be comfortable sticking one of them in your place, and implanting yourself in theirs, where “you” are happy, oblivious to the suffering this version of you had endured? Wouldn’t you just be condemning another soul (which is in some ways a version of you!), for personal gain?
What if this branch just ceases to exist if a transplant, without a swap, is made? What of all the good people who are better off in this branch, compared to your target branch (a-la The Butterfly Effect)?
Indeed why should anyone at all be forced to experience being “you” at all? Maybe the present you is the one who actually has the strength to either endure it another day, or end it – thereby taking away, as a mercy, a hard decision from your alternates who “could have been in your shoes”?
In other words, perhaps you’re the right person in the right place in the right time. Despite what it feels like.
Having read many of your posts I have a hunch you wouldn’t have made a swap or transplant, without knowing the implications beforehand, and feeling it’s morally justified.
Just my two cents.
Good to see you again. I hadn’t really considered whether or not the alternate versions of me would be ‘philosophical zombies’. I suppose I tend to assume that all animals are conscious to some extent (possibly because solipsism terrifies me). I also wonder whether consciousness might be a necessary part of a mind – could I function and behave in exactly the same way without ‘the lights being on’?
I find it hard to believe that this version of me is the best off of all possible alternatives. I can certainly imagine things being worse, but I can also think of so many ways things could easily be better, without that much having to go differently. The thought that of all the countless branches, this is actually as good as it gets – kind of a downer.
I suppose the underlying presumption of my post is that there is some core/soul ‘me’, independent of all life experience and personal flaws, that could magically be transplanted into an alternative universe. So ‘I’ would have all the traits and memories of the better version, and ‘they’ would have all my flaws and neurosis.
It’s hard to say, but I think I’d be sorely tempted. If it has to be one of us stuck here experiencing this, then why me? I suppose I’ve ‘earned’ my suffering, but then if we switched positions they would have my history and I theirs’. Although I guess if they were then placed in my position, with the same thoughts, they would simply swap right back.
If you add cosmicide into the mix, then it does seem sound pretty terrible. But I still think I’d be tempted in my darkest moments. Afterward, no guilt, no memories, no consequences – just freedom. Perhaps I’m that selfish. Maybe I would feed a whole branch of the multiverse into the woodchipper, just for the sake of my own happiness. That doesn’t say anything good about ‘me’ – but then that’s kind of the point. Afterwards, I wouldn’t be that person anymore – I’d be the better version of me.
I think the premise is that I swap all traits with another version – so they then have all the same strengths and weaknesses I do now. They’re identical, except for the postulated ‘core/soul’, which is swapped. So they’d be just as suited or unsuited to handle this version of reality as I am now.
Possibly what all of this highlights is the flaw in my conceptualizing a self that is somehow independent from my memories, experiences, and neuroses. A self that could be extracted and swapped. Perhaps the self is simply the conscious experience of all of those things, and there is nothing to swap.
I suppose I should have elaborated a bit.
The “best case” scenario would be, IMO, your consciousness or soul only exists in this branch at the moment, while in other branches (where a version of “you” exists) your alternates are philosophical zombies.
To clarify, this term suggests a machine-like meatbag which doesn’t experience existence at all, but acts in the world in a way indistinguishable from an alternative meatbag who does.
This is just a thought experiment, of course; if consciousness is a truly emergent property then the whole idea of philosophical zombies crumbles.
The reason for it being the best case scenario is that you get to just switch a vessel – you don’t hurt the other “you” because there was nobody there in the first place.
I do like your thoughts regarding cosmicide, your arguments are sound.
Especially the somewhat comical “I would probably destroy the universe; it all hinges on this dude’s decision and he’s willing to destroy a universe! I would be the guy who killed that maniac!” ;p
Of course this still leaves the problem of other people’s alternate lives.
If your empathy sphere is literally just you, then none of this matters. Just wave the magic wand please.
The question only becomes interesting if in all available target branches you have to sacrifice the wellbeing of another (or many) for your gain. Somebody you actually care about.
I mentioned The Butterfly Effect because it was an interesting exploration of a version of this idea; one where the main character retains memories from previous branches, as well as “having lived” the whole history of the doppleganger.
Somehow there was always a dealbreaker – a person he cared about being worse off compared to at least one known branch – which drives his continuous attempts at fixing things.
I vaguely remember The Butterfly Effect and finding it interesting (if rather confused). For me the retention of memories would make the whole thing pointless. Most of my suffering comes from within rather than external circumstances.
Surely the point of the theory is that everything that can happen is really happening somewhere? So there will always be exactly the same number of people you care about in the exact same circumstances. Maybe in one universe your friend is a disabled drug addict, and in another they’re happy. But all you’re really doing is altering which of them you happen to encounter. The unhappy version still exists, no matter where ‘you’ are. Ethically speaking, it’s entirely neutral (except for the alternate of yourself that you transplant into a worse world to replace you.)
I guess the approach of the movie was that only one version of the universe actually existed, and he was somehow able to turn back time and alter it. Which does bring up it’s own interesting issues. I think in that scenario I might well be tempted to alter all of reality to suit my own needs, but again only if I didn’t retain memories of my previous self. I’m not sure what the ethics are of replacing one reality with another that suits you better.