AXYZ

Like all other places on the internet, this site has an anti-suicide slant. Or call it “support”. That’s fine.

But where does one go to discuss truly pro-suicide thoughts, feelings and philosophies, without the tiresome, hypocritical “don’t do it” from other supposedly suicidal folk?

You can check my past posts to see how often I talk about the scam of “suicide prevention” – a highly lucrative field that encompasses everything from pharmaceuticals to entertainment to selling wrist bands. The news is full of “heroes” who “save” a suicidal person, but nobody prints the follow up story that the suicidal person, after a mandatory 5 day hold and […]

If I hear this one more time, I might just go ahead and hang myself in the woods to prove that I am alone.

Not on this site (we generally understand suicide better) but on other support sites, tv ads and subway placards it has become a slogan as meaningless as McDonalds “I’m lovin it.” The truth is the majority of depressed/suicidal people are, literally, alone. I don’t care if there’s someone halfway across the world who feels the same way I do. We are still mutually alone. There is no one in the room with us. Just a computer screen and a bunch of 1s […]

See answer below.

Found this online. “Death with dignity” nonprofits are making a sh*t load of money off suicidal people. Bus fare to the nearest bridge, cliff or tall structure is 1/100th what they charge, not to mention plane fare to Switzerland. But I suppose anyone who pays into their scheme deserves to be fleeced.

Google prison suicides. If they can do it, we certainly aren’t any more special than them. All corpses are the same, equal dignity.

I just find it particularly disgusting that these “non profits” are making so much off of our misery and parading under some righteous banner.

The following is from an article in a […]

A lot of people, presumably Americans, complain that suicide is unreasonably difficult due to laws, inaccessibility of guns, etc.

The irony is that the USA is one of only a dozen countries where firearms are legal. And here’s the funny part. Suicide rates are the highest in countries without guns or assisted suicide. In other words, Americans quit whining, no one else has a problem.

For the record, I’m in America so this is directed at me as much as anyone else.

or was there always something “wrong” about you?

And which do you think is worse, losing happiness, or always being miserable?

One less suffering soul in the world. One more soul who found peace.

Why does society tell us to cry and shake our fists and donate money to “suicide prevention” when the act of suicide itself is an individual’s way of successfully ending their pain? Why do we glorify police officers when they wrestle a suicidal person to the ground and throw them in lockup for 3 days, thus “saving” them, even though after 3 days that person is going to go right back to suicidal agony? Why do we tell people to “be strong” and eke out 80 years of agonized life even though we […]

A year or two ago there was a user (forgot the name) who posted a lot about insomnia. The posts got increasingly desperate and then suddenly stopped.

I’ve had sporadic insomnia all my life which I’ve managed with pills, but now it’s really bad and the pills don’t work (doctors have prescribed so many I lost track). None of the natural remedies do a damn thing (melatonin, valerian, exercise, fresh air, and my favourite: “happy thoughts”, it’s all bullshit).

Wondering if anyone out there knows what I’m talking about, or if the user I mentioned rings a bell. I won’t ask how to cope because there is […]

If you think a 5 minute phone call to an 800 number can save your life, or if some stupid song by a pop band can fix your miserable existence, or a teen melodrama on Netflix or a damn arm band will make you accept 50+ more years of this torture, then by all means donate all your money to one of the many “suicide awareness” groups. They’ll be more than happy to take your money.

If I have one message to give the world, it would be that there’s no fix for suicide. The act of organisms willfully ending their own lives, through starvation or […]

Suppose you could go back in time and nudge yourself to do something differently. In other words, you can’t change history or tell yourself about the future or what horse to bet on, you can only make yourself take a different course of action in regard to something you did.

Would that fix your life? Or at least make it bearable now?

If so, what would you change?

If you have children PLEASE DO NOT READ

I’m serious, this is going to get nasty

And I’ll delete it soon enough

This is not directed at anyone but my OWN fucking parents

I just have to shout this somewhere otherwise I’ll jump off the interstate overpass I fucking swear

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Here goes

People with mental disorders should NEVER, NEVER by any stretch of anyone’s diseased, selfish imagination, NEVER have children. Ok? Fucking genetic Typhoid Marys passing your shit […]

1. Over the course of your entire life, how many people have told you that they’ll “always be there for you”?

2. Where are they now?

My answers:

1. Around 5. Two parents, maybe 3 (ex-)girlfriends.

2. Both parents are 1000 miles away, living a self-absorbed life. Who the hell knows where my exes are, it’s been years.

If you’ve been following my last few posts, you know I’m not a fan of “suicide prevention” efforts, because obviously nothing has helped any of us here. I guess I’m just going to leave a trail of posts like this, so that when someone finally investigates my suicide, they’ll see the problem.

If you get in a serious car crash, you press 3 numbers on your phone and then you can pass out knowing that the ambulances, police & fire trucks will come and do everything in their power to save your life.

If you are diagnosed with cancer, the diagnosing doctor will immediately present you with […]

Check it out yourself. Go to the website for the American Foundation for Suicide Prevention (afsp.org) and weed through all the DONATE HERE pages and goofy stock pictures of happy people, navigate your way to “Find Support” and then click the blue button “I’m having thoughts of suicide”.

All it has are 3 links to other sites: Suicide Prevention Lifeline, Veterans Crisis Line, and Crisis Text – all of which are funded by the federal government (your taxes).

Give me $50 a year for web hosting fees and I’ll put up a web page that does the same thing and save $654,071.

Where the fuck is all this […]

I’ve been here about 2 years on & off, and I’ve made an observation. People who have been here for a long time generally don’t follow through with suicide. Whether it’s because they learn to cope, or whether it’s because they never really intended to go through with it, I don’t know.

I’m curious about this because I guess you could say I’m now a long termer, and yet my desire to die now is stronger than it has ever been. All week I’ve been scouting locations. Lots of very high bridges around here.

What I’m trying to figure out, through trends of other suicidal people similar […]

What do you do after you’ve reached out for all the help you can find, confided in friends, family, the suicide hotline, the suicide chat line, psychologists, psychiatrists, gone to a mental hospital, dutifully taken all the pills, followed their advice, and STILL, years and $ thousands later, you are just as likely to blow your head off today as you were when this whole thing started?

Some people feel bad about leaving “loved ones” behind. Some people feel guilty thinking that suicide is evidence of failure. It is. But it’s not your failure. It’s the failure of all the people who say they’re there to […]

Disclaimer: if you are involved in “suicide prevention” marches, speeches, pep rallies or ice cream socials, please skip this post as it will certainly offend.

Another “suicide prevention” spectacle was held, and this one caught my attention because people were supposed to wear beads to represent their suicidal experience. Red = loss of a spouse or partner, white = loss of a child, and green = personal struggle or attempt at suicide.

How about I wear yellow beads to represent the bile welling up in my throat every time I think of all the self-righteous people who raise money, sell t-shirts, do tv interviews and feed this […]

Every time I hear a stupid top 40 song on the radio about “just be yourself” it makes me want to hang myself.

If “just be yourself” were true, women wouldn’t wear a scrape of makeup. Men wouldn’t shave, bathe or bother to work off that beer gut. Everyone would drive a crappy dented car and live in a house that hasn’t had a fresh coat of paint in 50 years. Everyone would have bad breath. No one would say ‘please’ or ‘thank you’ and everyone would be rude, tactless, racist A*holes sitting around in their underwear jerking off to porn.

And yet, “just be yourself” is […]

I don’t believe in hell in the literal sense. I do believe certain people live in a mental hell of their own creation, consumed by the hypocrisies and moral conflicts that they will not fix. The priest who molests children, the cop who shoots an innocent person, the list goes on. I believe these people, in their private introspective moments, live in a hell unimaginable.

But that’s not enough for me. There are certain people who need to suffer worse than that. They deserve the fire and brimstone that young children are taught to believe in. But it’s really a child’s tale cooked up to cover […]

Let that sink in. Probably the one profession on this damn planet which everyone can agree is not for personal profit, which only does good for the world, where the people are of a much higher caliber of human than your average schmuck on the street – and they are 10x more likely to kill themselves than the average schmuck on the street.

I’m trying desperately hard to find some kind of divine logic in the state of human existence. But everything points to the good ones suffering and dying off while the douchebags assume total control.

I read that in an article about online depression resources once. The author’s point was that suicidal people should not be helping suicidal people. My initial reaction was anger and wanting to tell the author she had no clue – the old “you just don’t understand” argument that we all love to end arguments with.

Over the last year or two, I’ve been reading along here, commenting less & less, posting almost never, until I realized that there is truth to what that author said, for a number of reasons.

First there’s the obvious “physician heal thyself” argument. If we give such good advice, then why are […]