Every night I would hold a loaded 9mm to head, I never had the fucking balls to pull the trigger. I kept going to work, see people, paying bills …. I got dropped from insurance and ran out of LAMICTAL,, oh well. I started to get a new life in order, a tiny bit of exercise via biking around SF. I feel ok, not great, but ok, which is awesome since I’ve wanted to off myself for 20 years and my girl friend did so with me present. life is full of crazy shit, things can get better. stay busy.
Why is suicide illegal? You just do it anyways. It is the perfect crime. I want to have assisted suicide places to go to. I bet they would only take cash.
I’ve got a loaded gun in hand, oh how I want the courage to pull the trigger, you have no idea (maybe you do, you’re here on S/P)
We eat crap food, smoke, drink, do risky crazy stuff that is all against our Survival Instinct, but that is easy. I guess killing our self slowly is OK.
I’m going to cook some bacon, have a Pepsi, a smoke, a red bull, Doritos, Vodka and a donut. That should do it.
At least that is my life. Ups and Downs, however the “ups” are smaller and the “downs” are getting larger. Work, no money, illness, family and tons more. I’m tired and need a really long break. Since I own nothing, the break will be permanent
It’s 3:11 am, I’m just hanging out until my Xanax kicks in. To bad all my problem will still be here tomorrow. I really really need to pull the trigger. Since I’ve got only 8 pills left, maybe that sets the date 🙂
Take This Test: 10 Points or more, Catch-the-Bus
5 pts = Do you have a terminal illness whereby you’ll die within a year
2 pts = Just broke up with your lover
2 pts = Serious financial troubles
3 pts = Serious mental illness
2 pts = truly no real way to better you life
1 pts = I’m not attractive, I hate my looks
4 pts = You’re serious disabled, paraplegic, deaf and blind …
3 pts = Addicted to one or more serious drugs, Heroin, Cocaine, Meth
1 pt = Have no friends, everyone hates you
Insanely Happy
When all else fails and life is unbearable, we have an awesome way out! Look at it this way – as life gets worse and worse, smile back knowing you can simply pull the trigger and all your troubles fade away in an instant. Knowing that suicide is an option AND possibly the best answer, that should make you blissfully happy, it does with me. I’m 100% going to check-out, but life like there is no tomorrow (because there won’t be). Take Control, go wild, and then Catch-the-Bus. CTB-Driver
I have hundred’s of reasons to die, and almost none to live (zero that matter).
Where do I find the courage? Get drunk, drop some pills? I do have a loaded gun in mouth, so that part is OK.
I sat calmly next to my best friend, she wrote a long note, we talked, she cried, then was free. 12 Gauge Shot gun, duct taped barrel to bite down in her mouth on rifle pushed agianst the wall, back to side of the bed. I held her tight as she pulled the trigger. Next up…
I’m totally broke and some a-hole stole my bike I freakin need to get around. God dam, I’m pissed, sad, angry, bummed-out, helpless, oh-ya, Screwed !!!
It’s really hard not to think about this all day and night, shit, shit, shit
“Hang in there, it will get better, lots of people care about you, I do and we’ve never met. Just get some professional help and meds, you’ll see – life is great” complete B S. Pull the trigger, our life is meaningless, we are so insignificant, it’s comical.
Suicide is the best answer to a “no win” situation of on-going permanent daily pain, rejection, and certanity of things really not changing much
I’ve had it all … Zyprexa, Lamictal, Zanex, Lexapro, Oxycodone, Percoset, Ambien, and dozens more plus Pot, Alcohol, LSD, and more.
And months of nothing – which is the worst because you are then stuck with your thoughts
What is your favorite? What are you on and does it help?
Years of harsh action will explode into one nasty reaction. Happens all the time. Lets all go out in style, make some noise, it’s our exit party. Start a new urban legand with your departure, be creative
The only way I can keeping going is to know I have a back-up plan already to go. A loaded, short barrel, pump action shot gun under my bed. I’m so close, it will be awesome, peaceful, no more pain. Plan B makes me feel great, just pull the rip cord !
Life is about 10% good, 30% normal or boring and 60% really bad or crappy – if you’re lucky
Come on kids – pull it together. Wait until you are homeless, bankrupt, and have cancer before suicide is an option
I think there are only two types of people here. 1. Those wanting to give up and die
2. Those who say it will get better, hang in there
Is there a third type?
An Indiana toddler named Angel initially survived a devastating tornado that killed the rest of her family last week. But the 14-month-old was taken off life support Sunday and died. So go right ahead, pull the trigger – No problem.
I’d like to read their last few posts !!!!
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