I really dont know why I feel so alone…I have so many people in my life that love me very much, but I feel so alone. Sometimes I think maybe that is the reason why I feel alone. Life is so wierd these days. I feel like it is all just a blur. I stay up late and sleep in late. I go to work and hate it. I come home but I dont want to be here. I use to never be like this until poof one day everything is different. I honestly dont think that I am depressed but maybe I am… I […]
So tomorrow will mark a week that my uncle has been gone. I still cant believe that all of this isnt just a dream. My mom is taking it bad and my grandparents a lot worse…but what about me? It seems like everyone is in there own little world and It doesnt matter to them how I feel. It hurts sooo bad!!! I just want to scream…since I wrote the last time I have thought soo much into doing it…but i wont. I think that this is my way of venting my anger and getting the advice that I need to move on…thank you sooo much […]
I found out tuesday that my uncle commited suicide…he hung himself from a tree. God he was brave and the best person in the world. I dont understand why he wanted to die. I understand why I want to die…I have nothing going for me. I have thought about killing myself since I was 13… I will be 19 in less then a month. And I havent thought about killing myself in about 4 months…but since my uncle did it I feel like I want to again. Like I feel like I gave up on the only thing I have wanted to do for such […]