I made a note to be read when im gone about a month ago. Even though im still here I have it safe in my wallet. I wonder every time I read it if I should add some more? Its not the first note I’ve written. It probably wont be the last. Im wondering when I am gone if every one I write will be found. All my life Ive been judged. When people are talking about me, for some reason my ears just cant ignor. The things I hear make me write more. More is suppose to be a good thing right? Is the […]
jennifermh65
jennifermh65
Im 23 years old dignost with bipolar, add, chronic depression, insomnia, nightmares. I was bullied when I was growing up. From kindergarden to high school. I have 7 siblings and 3 fathers. I was also sexualy abused from 3 to 15 years old
why cant I kill myself?
why cant my methods work?
why do people insist on stopping me?
why cant you see my pain?
Why cant you see im only trying to stop it?
why cant you let me go? (its not like you care for me)
why not let me hate myself if you hate me?
Why cant I just die with a smile on my face?
why so many masks that no one can see threw?
why is there a why?
When I was 13 years old I went threw a lot of stuff. I was always sad. always crying. I felt ugly and ashamed of myself. At this point my older siblings found a way to get our dad to send them to mothers house ( who left when I was 9 months old), so i was by myself with his girlfriend Paula. She always fought with me and yelled at me. One day during the summer she said she hated me and i was nothing and my dad didn’t care about me. I told her fine and grabbed a rope. I went out […]