Is it suicide if I eat junk food until I have a heart attack? Since I can’t actually kill myself.. I felt like this would be an easier way. Would take longer but at least I can eat yummy food.. which would eventually lead to my wanted death. It’s kind of like when you die while or after having sex.. you died, but at least you died happy.
I just want to talk. I don’t want to talk to my friends and I don’t want to worry my family. Please. I could really use some kind words.
As I sit here, the sorrow sets in. Welcome back! For a second, I thought you wouldn’t return, old friend. The sound of the waves crashing can’t compare to the sound of my heart breaking. This is the second Spring I’ve had to spend feeling the cold stab of abandonment. The summer will grant me the chance to hide my embarrassment. Until then I’ll be in this place, hoping to meet my end. If only I could tie bricks to my feet and be taken away by the ocean.
It’s Thursday. Tuesday I felt strong, happy, like I was making some progress. Wednesday I felt like I was unloved. Today, I feel utterly hopeless. I don’t know why I can’t just be okay. I feel like I have been through enough. Why can’t my pain just end? I don’t understand why one day is so great and the next is hell. I wish some one could just come and make everything better.
To quote some lyrics, “I want to come out of the dark but breaking away is so hard. Just show me the way. Show me which way to go. Can’t do this by […]
I can’t face these people of the day
They don’t like me, but that’s okay.
I’ll go to my sanctuary where nothing is as hard as it may seem.
I’ll go to sleep and get lost in a dream.
I’m in a castle. It’s decorated in gold.
I am surrounded by friends, both young and old.
I go to the garden, where the beauty is endless.
The sights are lovely, the feeling is priceless.
I am at peace as my heart erupts
I feel at home, that is, until I wake up.
Glass is fragile
Never let it drop
You will try to pick up the pieces
And you will never stop
Even when you’re cut
And the blood starts to pour
You will continuously try to fix
What can’t be fixed anymore
You can try to put the pieces together
But you will still see the cracks
The glass is gone.
You will never get it back
I’m afraid to speak my own name
For it has been tarnished.
Life is a stern mistress
And I will forever be punished.
Time can never mend
These broken bones and burnt flesh.
The past is haunting.
It grants me no rest.
My character now is poor
Harsh and uninviting.
Anger consumed my body.
Now, my heart is dying.
The rain casts a heavy weight
On this, my weakened umbrella.
But still, I hope
To reunite with the old Daniella.
I’m trapped!
As I pace back and forth in my cage,
I wondered what I did to deserve such a fate.
A fate that gives me no hope, no pleasure, no freedom.
Freedom to breathe, freedom to live, freedom to be whole.
These bars are cold and binding.
They whisper,
“You have no place to run,
“No place to run,
No place to hide,
No place to go.
You will never be free.”
I’m new here so I guess I’ll start with some history. I have three half-blood brothers, and one full-blood brother. I have one half-blood sister and a woman I consider to be my sister, but really isn’t. My parents passed away. My mother when I was two. My dad when I was eight. I was molested when I was nine. I lived with a very sadistic and controlling woman for about four years. I then moved in with my brother, when I was twelve. He taught me how to live, how to love, and how to be a good person. I’m now in college. I’m […]