sbkstep43

Here the thing with milestones in life….

It doesn’t really affect you most when you hit them but when you look back on them. You know do see how far you have came.

Ages 16- 21 are ‘usually the ages that really curb the future’. But for me, all those years, I try to end my future. No one thinks of after ‘recovery’. When life hits you so hard and you try to fight everything against, what do you do when there is no more fight to be had?

That why most people will ‘relapse’, not because they want to but because that fight and that pain has […]

All the sweeties that is part of our little online world can we just agree to disagree please lets just get to help people and being lovey – dovey friendly this agruement is really sickening

Sp used to be a home for me but now it’s been defiled with regilious babble it’s so annoying guys seriously just stop already the rules say no preaching and this has gone way too far for the sake of the non religious …..could you please stop

Kris

Taking a break from sp till all this religious speech is done it is sickening now so lates peeps

So I am doing a research paper and the affects of human rights on gay marriage but I google some info and where I live is one of the most homophobic countries …… Such a great country to be a bi sexual in right I wish I could just take a gun and shoot everyone in my country who are against lgbts including my dad and brother then I don’t care if I end up in prison ….it’s getting to me ….yeah I wear big shirts and baggy shorts I am in love with caps forever in my sneakers so what if I look like […]

A friend told me that if you want something to happen you have to work for it …..he never said it was this hard ….. That there would be nights of crying, so much pain and hurt , so many haters ……but he believed in me he would walk a mile to the nearby park just to get internet to talk to me just to cheer me up but I think he believed wrong I’m nt worth that much but I survived because of him and now I miss him

Everyone seem to think I’m ready for my finals and I’m gonna pass but I’m scared shitless pardon my language it’s my first college finals and at the top of my class ……gonna drink and go for a run to calm down …….later lovelies

January: did mocks exam …. Restarted school terms
February : got suspended and dropped out of high school , meet my best friend / ex boyfriend / witch guru , found my ex girlfriend was pregnant , failed suicide attempt
March to May : studied for exam and did some
June : did some exam started a new rship with a old friend , had to deal with her getting rape and kidnapped by her brother which lead in July
August : lost my gf to said best friend was in a new rship with this guy got engaged to him almost lost him to […]

Guys imma disappeared for a while so I can study for my finals soon probably be back before march …….hopefully I pass the subjects wish me luck

Night before school and I am crying to the bf that I don’t want go , he doesn’t seem to understand how it feel to have no friends or how it feel to lock away in the bathroom cry your eyes just to come and show a fake smile , I’m just the freak at school no matter which school I go why can’t I just be homeschooled again why do I have to go tomorrow oh flipping well better practice my fake smiles happiness never lasts goodnight all sweet dreams.

What is truth ? According to my family truth is based on the opinion of many and not the opinion of one . When the mass agree on one opinion that is now the truth. And to me humanity is flawed because we go against nature …… We believe in a supreme being no what the religion but as soon as we receive money or become rich we move further from religion ……could it be that we believe in a god because we were afraid of the unknown and that fits the role , the bible talks sorcery but we fail to believe in witches […]

Do I really want to say goodbye …….I have a good boyfriend that I am starting to trust he is as random and weird as me but I keep finding myself siting on the ledge thinking whether to jump or to survive …….to be honest I think better out of the ledge

I know I haven’t posted in a good while. I really don’t know what going on in my life. I go to a new school with like seven people more like seven bullies I stand like a sore thumb because I am the only  that never graduated.  I’m in a new relationship and everyone says I seem less depressed but really I have just gonna better at faking. He seems to really love me though but he wants to be a sailor ……..I don’t know if I will be able to handle the worry with him being on the sea. Umm what else my parents […]

Hey

I know i have not done a post in a while now but I’m here trying to recovery but in some deep problems ….. Just here to say recovery is possible you just have to be strong and believe that you want better for yourself ….no one wants to help someone that doesn’t want to help themselves so take that first step …..throw away the blade , throw the rum down the drain , put the pill bottle where it belongs and find the strength to move on .

Kris