Anxiety is the unwelcome guest within my mind. Nay, not a guest, but the unwelcome demon that inhabits the depths of my being, not just my mind. It captures my whole body in its icy tendrils that are mistaken for its hands, it slams loud noises and makes me jump, it causes me to sweat and shiver at the same time. My heart races faster than a horse at the Kentucky Derby finish line, causes my hands to shake more than the milkshakes that bring the boys to the yard, and forces my brain to whirl in a fashion not unlike the Tasmanian Devil from […]
Sometimes I think I think too much. Actually, I know I think too much. What the fuck is this? Second post in like a week or something. Clearly I’m falling downhill, I made a strong vow to myself to not come back here and post unless I was in dire need of venting, and I guess I’m there.
1. Worried as hell about my new summer job, as I will miss a lot of other events I wanted to do this summer
2. Wanted to teach myself multiple languages this summer and can’t now because will be too busy
3. I’m ridiculously inadequate in terms of every single […]
I’m part of a ****** chat room called Crisis-Chat, and most if not all of the users from there, are from here. I was one of the few… okay maybe the only one, to have joined SP AFTER I joined ******. Anyway.
Lots of people post here, lots of people threaten suicide. I seem to do it enough that I might as well post it here for attention, right? I don’t even fucking know what I want to do anymore. I’m tired but I’m not. I’m hungry, but when I eat, I feel sick. My head hurts but its magically fine if I go to take […]
So I swore I’d never post here again, that my last post about being tired wasn’t going to lead to another. That it was a one time venting thing. So why’m I here again? Good Lord, I don’t even know. Maybe it’s because I want to off myself, but am too afraid to do it. Maybe because I’m all talk, and just desire some kinda of attention, even if its just negative attention. Perhaps its a plea for help, so people talk to me. Maybe its so I don’t feel as miserable and alone. I created Tumblr for the same reason – as an outlet […]
Tired of life, tired of trying, tired of it all. Geezer crispies, no matter what I do or say or anything, I fuck up and no one likes me. I try to help, I try to make them smile, I try to make people forget their problems and what not… it doesn’t work. I am hopeless, worthless, useless, disgusting, stupid, need to go. I’m unhelpful. I’m not able to BE helped. I wish I could just lay down and disappear for life, but, I can’t. I’m too chicken to suicide, I’m too cowardly to run away, I won’t do stupid shit. What the fuck am […]