sister became rebellious. i got punished for her actions. moved away to another counrty. dad didnt come with. got bullied at school. girls acted like friends but stole from mw.  i switch schools the nwxt year. sister rebells smokes weed and does stuff with a boy. mom hates me . she hits us , and makes us do everything by ourselves. its like we have no mom. at school no one stalks to me for months they think im emo.  everything okay for awhile. dad comes home. spends 20000 dolars all of our savingz. on a lady he cheatdd on my mom multiple times including […]

Hello Everyone , I would like to know if anyone has any ideas on where i may obtain barbiturates.? tuinal, ******** etc

                   Thankyou,    Ian

Hey all,

It’s 10 days since I decided to follow a plan in order to give myself a last chance to become a better man and find meaning in life (http://suicideproject.org/2014/01/ive-got-my-plan/). Unfortunately each day is just more difficult.

I’m on the right path with most of my goals, I’m seeing friends (even those I hadn’t seen for years), I’m visiting my family and spending time with them, I’m preparing a trip to a place I wanted to visit, I keep visiting my therapist (didn’t find the guts to tell him about my thoughts). I go out and I wear my mask, people think that I’m ok while […]

I wish I knew what’s wrong with me – I think I may have started a few posts with that line before! I need a rant, and a good long cry, and some sort of an answer from whichever celestial being might be listening. I have been single for a long time, now I have a fantastic boyfriend. He tells me everyday that I’m beautiful, yet I can’t allow myself to believe him. I’m convinced that he’s too good for me. He loves me, and he wants to marry me – yet I find myself fighting the urge to cut, and I have so many […]

i need you
but i can’t tell you that
i need you to be here
but you’re busy
but i need you to comfort me
but you’re busy with important things in your life
i need you to be here
like you promised
you promised that you would be there
but you’re not
and now i feel broken
i don’t know
maybe i deserve it
maybe im not that important
i guess im not
i don’t know your side of the story
but i need you
but you aren’t here
you broke your promise
that you’ll be there for me
where are you now?

I’ve never had a true friendship until I met my best friend/sisster/coach. I mean I’ve had friends but never one I could go to about anything. I’ve had fake friends, friends that used me, friends that left me, friends I’ve pushed away. It feels so good to have a true friend that knows everything and you can always go to. A friend that brings the best out in you. A friend that loves you for you and not the person you make everyone else fall for. A friend you trust with your life. One that will do anything for you. One that you will do […]

i need to post things
but i cant
one of my friends
they check on me
i don’t know how regularly
i don’t know when
but because of that
i can’t post certain things
and its killing me
because im bottling my feelings
maybe its good
to do this
to bottle them up
how should i know
but i need to post things
but i cant
and now what
should i do?

I didn’t eat yesterday but a small bowl of chicken pasta from panera bread. I haven’t eaten anything today yet. But I know my best friend/sisster is going to make me eat lunch. I just don’t like eating, I think eating is gross. On top of that I don’t have an appetite for anything. Plus I am a very picky eater.

I don’t want to see you. But I want to see you. I don’t know what to do.

Today was the first time I’ve been home alone with you sense January 4. I can’t believe what happened that day… It’s hard for me to forget.

I think we all know the feeling of sitting in the corner of your dark, lonely room. Trying not to wake your parents as tears slowly drown you. As you start to see the sun rise you get up off the floor. You wipe your tears and start with your day. You fake getting up and getting ready to look pretty. You head off to school and act like everything is fine and you laugh and smile. But on the inside you know it’s not okay. No one knows you cried all last night. No one would even guess that. You head home. You lock […]

Today I’m going to lunch with my best friend/sisster. She knows my whole life story and I love her and respect her so much. I don’t know what I would do without her. She has been through a lot with me and I make up excuses and she doesn’t buy them so that’s how I know she will always be there for me know matter how many times I try to push her away. I’ve lost many friends buy pushing them away with all my excuses. I hope today goes well for me and I will let you all know how it goes.

i dont know myself anymore, i look the same and act the same but i feel dead inside, incomplete and alone. this is not because i lost love or some shit like that, but i just dont feel worth anything. not a second of your time, not a breath of oxygen, not even the space i exist in. this isnt how im suppost to live this, isnt how i am. i’m gay…i came out to my mom a few months ago. she’s alright with it, but i just cant hide in this shell anymore. she told me not to tell anybody about it because they […]

I need advice.

I know I need help, I want help, I want to be able to talk to my parents about how I feel, I’m tired of being seen as the happy girl with no problems. That’s why I’m scared to say anything about how I’ve been feeling for so long, will they believe me? Will I disappoint them? I never talk to them about much anymore, I don’t feel I can. How can I tell them something like this?

How can I tell them? I’m dying inside day after day.

Feeling insecure,
PURPLEPAIN

This may sound stupid but I just want to know…
If you are visiting here and believe you can relate to the postings and feelings of worthlessness and despair, and truly feel like you want to escape, have you as a child or at any other time messed with a Ouija board? I know it sounds corny. But I’m curious.

I’ve never really thought about typing this out, but after reading who knows how many of these post that have made me feel such I wide range of emotions, knowing how much they’ve helped me I figured maybe adding mine could help someone else out there.

Sorry for this part, I know it will be boring to read, I just want to get my whole story out there.

My name is A, I am sixteen years old. I have severe depression and anxiety and probably OCD. I’ve been bullied since 6th grade. I’ve been called just about every name in the book, but […]

I (x) out all the tags because I don’t want my post to be tagged, but every time I delete them and click update, it keeps showing back up!!  How do I get rid of them?  Please help.

I thought fuck this. I considered suicide. I looked on Google as I search Google for everything. I wanted a painless way to die but I couldn’t find one.
I didn’t want to feel any sort of pain or discomfort matter of fact I didn’t want my life to end I just wanted the bad stuff to stop. I still wanted to hang in my PJ’s all day, watch movies & eat junk. I just didn’t want the crap like expectations/
get a job
keep it
b successful
have children get married

I found this website when I Googled ‘suicide starvation’. Some sick part of me wants to thank the people who’ve written about such topics, as I’ve never found a website that made me feel so secure before. Reading the stories and other bits on here has given me a new light to look to. One where I’m not as alone as I once believed to be.

I don’t have much else to say right now. Now’s not the time to share my story, and I’m doubtful of anyone wanting to be bothered with that anyway. It seems we all have our own problems to deal with […]