why did my mom keep me. Cant she see she isn’t cut out for having  a 13 year old? She has all these mental problems. She drinks almost every night and threatens me. I have done nothing to her and she said she wants to hurt me or give me to my dad. whats the point of being here if my mom doesn’t want me.
My mom and dad were teenagers, and a simple, “Wait, let me get a condom,” could have stopped me from being born. That would’ve saved the DSS a whole lot of trouble.
I cut myself last night, even in an ok mood I cut my self. Im sick of life. I cant wait to graaduate and leave this house. They can talk shit about me but I cant. they judge but they dont see the changes Im triyng to make to be a better person. But insted they keep saying im worthless that im no good enough inanything and Im tierd of that.
I remember these desperate times,it was dark and teary, though i moved on and pick up my soul with some help.
I’m get these day of hopelessness, not being in control, kinda just find myself waiting for time to pass, i found beauty in the dark and hate time even more.
this feeling runs deep and i dare not think of cutting, death, but fact is i’m physical more alone then i was in depressed, and i dont feel as alone. but some time reality struck a cord and i realize i am, it the most gut ranching feeling .
I’ve been trying to focus just on my […]
Bodies spread out across the land
Hearts laid out into burning fields
Many lives to be sewn
Many lives to be harvested
A true purpose for man and his labor
Hearts of man as fuel for fields
Fueling the future of man
Seeding the prospects of evil
This life is a tasking, enduring, teasing and a torturous pastime. A place basked in displeasure and enduring pain. One minute you are in extreme distress, then peppered with specs of gold promising to guild you enduring happiness, which are only and quickly blown away by the winds of reality.
The wedding day, your childhood Christmas, that promotion and a good grade are pleasures that you endure pain to achieve and are whisked away in to the darkness of maybe a non-exact expectation but most certainly by the coming day.
You have your moment to shine and they’ll say well done for your moment […]
Hello, my name is Coco. It’s nice to meet you all, I suppose…
Well, I really don’t know how to start my story or anything… I just want a place to share my feelings…
Let’s just say, I once loved… /or I still do.. and I can’t move on../ this boy… And suddenly, one day /when we were still dating/, he recieved news that I committed suicide, or just simply died /out of the blue/. So, he tried moving on ’cause his friends pushed him into it, was what he said. He started dating this eleven year old girl. He then later found out that I was […]
I wish I had a gun.right now….
Pewds, you saved my life, your my bucket of smiles and ocean of laughs, i am so happy you came into my life, i may not have you reply to me, but i love you bro and i hope someday you know, you saved one life that could have so little meaning…..
Thank you, from karlee
Really, what’s so great about this world anyways? All I see are a bunch of people who have too many worries to be bothered with some suicidal girl, and I don’t blame them, I wish I could be one of them but I’m not. I’m just a repulsive, hard to love, self harming, suicidal girl. I’m no one special or anyone that will be truly missed. Can someone come and stab me to death, please? It would be much appreciated.
you look at my life, seems calm and cozy. i have a well balcenced life with exersise and friends. got ski racing and cadets. From a birds eye view it looks as if  i have the near perfect life not just from other people but i think so to but im just so sad. my life is overrun in my mind i gotta think what to do next for cadets so the head officer wont give me shit. But he does any way no matter how hard i try. he tell me to do a list of things i need for next week. usaully saying […]
Do suicide pacts work?
Unless you’re a banana, of course.
A friend of mine sent this to me.
They clearly know more about me than they should.
The thing is, they’re convinced if I ever decide to take the plunge into the unknown, they’re going with me.
The problem, they’re perfectly content with life and living and blah blah blah.
Obviously, I won’t be letting that happen.
Anyhow. Thoughts. Kgo.
Does anyone here listen to XiuXiu ? Good band with many sings most of us could probably relate to… Or at least I do. In particular: “honeysuckle,” “born to suffer,” “Hi”
just in case anyone was looking for some new music or a distraction…
I just feel like I want to die. I haven’t got much to live for. People in my life would be sad if I died, when I die, for a small amount of time, and they would get over it and move on like I didn’t exist. My brother was the chosen, lovable child anyway. And now he has a baby so what the fuck am I. Less than what I was before. Less than nothing. Nobody can love me. Not me.
I give up!. I’ve been alone 80% of my life then ever with anyone. I’ve been alone since a teen. I can’t take it anymore!!. when I go to eat out so I’m not alone I’m put aloe in the back or in some corner single seat that even makes me feel more worse. My plan is almost ready to push the so call button. I have one more bill to pay off and I’m leaving this big empty world. Yes I had told some people and they all blew it off as a joke or didn’t even care. I only got two calls all […]
I have nothing left. I am scared all the time. I have a child and I don’t want to leave her. I don’t want to hurt her but I keep get beaten . When he doesn’t beat me I am scared he will. I tried to leave once and he followed me and broke in to the house I am staying. He checks my email, Facebook, my history on computer, my phone. He says he wants me to be happy but when I try he doesn’t want me to tell anyone what he has done.
he beats me.
i have nothing left. Nothing. I put everything in […]
So you want to know what it’s like? What it really feels like, without the sugar coating.
Well it’s simple it’s painful.
When you find out you sit there for at least ten minutes, your mouth wide open like a goldfish. Oh but your not breathing, your in shock. You can’t believe it, you just sit and stare, unable to move or do anything. Then it starts to sink in and your breathing again but too fast you start to feel dizzy, then you start shaking. Then the tears come and they come fast, you can’t control them they pour and pour out of your […]
You look back and think damn what has happened that broke my soul down to nothing. I have been thinking about my family by 3 yr old son and my few close friends about how they are gona deal with this, And I honestly don’t care I have never been a mean person and I love my family and son but I have to put myself first once in life and end the pain I have for me, Has anyone else felt this way ? that it dosent bother you if you hurt your family anymore.
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Roses are red,
Violets are blue,
I’d rather be dead,
Than be here with you.
I feel bad because its not fair,
That no one else,
Has to deal with you there.
Oh but dear child,
You are not right,
I have been coming and going all night.
You see, I am not yours,
And you are not mine,
But simply we’re all just displacements time.
But that can’t be right,
The way that I feel,
All of these thoughts,
They feel surreal.
It can’t be true,
You’re lying to me,
The only ones here, are just me and you.
You do not see?
We are together,
With all of the […]
Well, I am 13 years old.. This all started when I was 12, the first time I tried killing myself was when the whole school started calling me a whore.. I’m a virgin, yes I’ve done stuff more than make out, but I mean.. I was dating them.. Anyway, I get bullied everyday. I cut myself every time someone Tells me to kill myself, I delete my Facebook sometimes because of how bad it gets.. Recently I started talking to this kid, ive known him for awhile. I was at his house & his ex girlfriend lied to him & not to mention her mother […]