HAVING A BATTLE BETWEEN MY MIND AND DEPRESSION
I don’t know how much more I can take the contant pain anymore I wanna die I wish I wasn’t here no one would miss me really life will go on without the pain I cause. Been staring at my rafters for days they are looking more and more enticing
Don’t tell me I have so much to live because I honestly I don’t
Maybe I deserve all this pain
I dont remember when was the last time I feel alive
THINKING OF KILLING YOU’RE SELF LOOKS SO EASY BUT WEN YOU’RE GOING TO DO IT A LITTLE VOICE IN YOUR HEAD STOPS YOU
There’s no way to describe my depression, hurt, rage, and emotional pain. So many people have hurt me, turned me away, and just treated me like shit. I can’t fucking take this anymore!
I don’t care who the fuck gets traumatized as they witness my death in a busy mall or airport. I WANT THEM TO BE TRAUMATIZED. Fuck you, society! I hate this lousy, Godforsaken planet, and everyday, I hope that an asteroid or nuclear war wipes it the fuck out!
I also don’t care who the fuck misses me. They won’t be my fucking problem anymore. People don’t give half a shit about me, so […]
I cant anymore
I feel so alone
My family hates me or dont onderstand me
I realize I dont have any friends
The person I loved is gone she leaved me all alone
Everyone thinks Im a weirdow
I dont wanna live anymore
Hold it together.
Birds of a feather.
Nothing but lies and crooked wings.
I have the answer.
Spreading the cancer.
You are the faith inside me.
No, Don’t, leave me to die here.
Help me survive here, alone.
Don’t Remember!
Remember!
Put me to sleep, Evil Angel.
Open your wings, Evil Angel. (Ahhh)
I’m a believer.
Nothing could be worse.
All these imaginary friends.
Hiding betrayal.
Driving the nail.
Hoping to find a saviour.
No, don’t, leave me to die here.
Help me survive here, alone.
Don’t Surrender!
Surrender!
Put me to sleep, Evil Angel.
Open your wings, Evil Angel. (oohh)
Fly over me, Evil Angel.
Why can’t […]
If I let anyone in close I just know that something will fall apart and I’ll be the one left behind trying to piece together the broken pieces of myself that have just been thrown back into my face. I have become the cold, detached one now, everyone’s not-quite friend, fun, sarcastic and vaguely interesting but never warm, inviting, or worth growing closer to. I am not the person you confess your deepest secrets to and I am not the one you go to for advice and I don’t really want to be (or do I?). I am hard to get hold of and impossible […]
A few months ago I posted a story about my best friend who was close to the edge and how I desperately wanted to stop him doing the wrong thing because he just had so much to live for. Well a lot of time has passed and he is still alive, I actually managed to stop him – but in doing so I put all of myself into what I can only crudely refer to as a mission and I know now that I lost myself. I learnt to think like a suicidal person, seeing the triggers, the pain, the hurt, the desire to end the pain – mostly because […]
A doll, with a painted smiled and cheerful eyes.
She wants to be heard, to scream and let that smile fall. But she can’t. She wasn’t made to do that.
The people around her wouldn’t be pleased. Her image of perfection cannot fall.
So much hidden, deep within and she keeps it close to her heart.
Silent cries and pleads to be free. From her inner demons, but no one’s willing to help.
To save this girl; save her from herself.
They expect her to buck up and deal with it, “that’s life”.
Ooooh.. You’ve just been commanded!! 😎 How does that shit feel?
I guess you’ve got no choice but to close the book on suicide and call it a day right?
The wrong people get shot innocently. Why couldn’t a couple of guys joy riding come along and do me a favor and shoot me in the back. I wish I could switch places with Chris Lane.
Im so pissed right now…back then when i was lying in bed all day with fresh cuts on my hands noone gave a fuck… but now when i have to get a stupid highschool diploma suddenly im in the center of attention.
HEY! IM SUICIDAL OVER HERE!!! Help?
“but you wont get anywhere without proper edjucation, darling!”
am i dead already? what the hell giong on… noone can see nor hear me. Im crying through the day… how can you not notice mascara all over my stupid face?
okay, i dont need help anyways, i dont want it… but atleast before i die it would nice to hear things […]
we wonder this earth born with no one put in are laps no one is given to us as are right we wish it was but in the end we haft to fight throw the shit and the pane the bully’s and the heart break all for what a wiled goose chase but the goose chase that we are all on Leeds some were we just haft to run little faster jump a little hirer grow wings and fly do the imposable prove the girls and the boys from school that they are all wrong that we can out live there hate that we can […]
When does something become a memory..?
When does a short term memory become a long term memory. And why is it that we remember certain things that happened and or not able to forget them regardless of how hard we try.
I couldn’t even get up today, i just didn’t see the point really. So I laid in bed all day thinking, and I reckon its about time I finally kill myself. I guess sleeping pills and a bottle of Jack Daniels will be the way I do it (I’m too much of a useless coward to try any other more painful methods) I wrote my will as well, (which was quite a a somber experience) I had trouble thinking of where all my money should go so I said for it to go to the Cancer Council, so it helps somebody I guess.
I don’t […]