The world is full of do gooders who have no concept of pain and suffering but have a total belief in their sense of what is right. They cannot listen to reason because their belief overshadows all. Like someone trapped in their own body paralised and helpless and unable to control their own future however the do gooders will tell that person that their suffering is all part of a great plan and they will achieve salvation, the fact they will have to live in agony for years does not matter, besides the do gooders do not live in agony as every day they condemn […]

Ive decided to close my account. This site hasent helped me, im sorry. Ill miss the niceness and vents, ill miss being able to talk to someone…i hope i can come back some day to vent again.

Bye sp, i may just miss you this much

My bestfriend told me today that he was close to killing himself but instead cut himself. I feel like I’m somehow responsible for it because I too cut. I feel like I almost kind of planted that idea in his head that it is an option because I told him about my cutting. But it makes me feel invisible, like after all I;ve told him about NOT starting and ot never do it because it’s addicting and he does. I want to tell him cutting isn’t good or the right answer, but thats so hypocritical! Like telling someone don;t cut, but it’s okay for me […]

…she would like it very much to live in a printed world. Where everything is written out, where Fate is written out. Where a little girl, whose heart is lost, must only move through the magic in the letters. Where she can define her own character and is not forced into a mould of someone else’s ideas. She would like it very much to be written into a family’s Sunday supper, with good food set on the neatly pressed table cloth. She would like to hug her mother and father goodnight, and crawl between the covers of her little bed. She would like to sleep soundly at […]

I am in so much pain inside me it is unreal. I never show it but it is just slowly eating away at me. I sit there and claw and cut at my skin. It just makes me feel so much better. It is the only way to make me feel better. When the first drop of blood hits the floor I feel so different.. so much better.. but then it all comes flooding back again. Is this wrong? Is it right? Help me someone. Please.

Hey, i really need to talk to some one.. the only person i have in my life who cares a little bit is my girlfriend who is also my bestfriend but she is friends with this guy who ive seen her messages to him..they contain messages like “i wish i had someone like you” and ” youre the only person i can talk to”
she says she loves me i dont think she does..i love her more than anything
i brought up these messages to her she said she didnt mean it but idk if shes lying
she stopped talking to him for a week […]

In all honesty I don’t know why I joined this site, I just sat down and typed “such a disappointment” into my browser and some how I got here. And now that I am here I think I have something worth saying. What that is I don’t know yet, but I guess I’m working on it.
I’ve never actually attempted suicide, but I have considered it. I’m sorry if that offends people who have attempted suicide and use this site as a way to voice themselves and their experiences. But just because I haven’t put myself on deaths door step doesn’t mean I havent felt […]

i don’t know why i am posting this.

i know my problems may seem trivial when compared to others. i know that there very may well be someone out there who would appreciate me more than she ever did. i know i bring most of this on myself. i know i made mistakes, and hurt her.

but i also know that i can’t do this. i know that i was truly happy, and i know that she was also truly happy. i know that my life is forever incomplete without her. i would be alive sure, but i wouldn’t be living. i feel so alone. i feel […]

i went to a job interview recently and they asked me to describe myself. i didnt wanna say the cliche so i went in there telling myself to be honest and nothing but.

i choked up at the question cause i had nothing to say. i really dont know who i am. i dont know how to describe myself beside the physical that they can already see. i have no real personality. i dont enjoy doing anything. i dont have any special skills. i’m rice and water. salt & pepper is too exciting

oh, and by the way, i bombed the interview. no job for me

i am annoyed today my mom came home after a 4 day trip for work and i liked it when she was gone i felt safe now with her back home i feel emotionally and physically unsafe just like before she left… any were but at home

I don’t believe in God much these days but it just seems absurd to me that he would forever punish people that commit suicide when I, me just being a relatively “good” person, wouldn’t. What kind of happy heaven is there to be expected then? Only a hypocritical one, where God is just a mother fucker that plays the “all merciful dad”.

“Is God willing to prevent evil, but not able?
Then he is not omnipotent.
Is he able, but not willing?
Then he is malevolent.
Is he both able and willing?
Then whence cometh evil?
Is he neither able nor willing?
Then why call him […]

I’m not a high school student who failed a test or was dumped by someone I had a crush on.

I’m not a twenty year old with no direction in life and alone.

I’m not thirty years old, single, unmarried, with a mediocre job and a mortgage.

I’m 44 years old… that’s important to know.

When I first killed myself, I was 18. After I was brought back, everyone told me that life would get better–that all I had to do was just hang in there for a little while longer.

When I attempted to kill myself at 27, everyone told me that life would get better and all I […]

Nothing feels real.

A lot of the time I get caught up on details and abstractness. On how we’re just clumps of atoms shoved together in a world which means nothing.

It makes suicide seem much less scary and guilt ridden. People die all the time. I don’t matter. I don’t want to matter. My pain only exists in my head and it’s all arbitrary.

We’re all tending towards dead anyway.

um, hey,  I’m new here and I don’t really get how this whole thing works, would anyone be kind enough to explain it for me?

Would you rather know how and when you are going to die or not know at all? I think I would prefer to know how and when, because I would set aside time to do most of the things I’ve ever wanted to do, but then again, I’d hate to know how little time I have with my girl… To know that I would never see her smile again just breaks my heart…

I don’t know why but these days I’ve been feeling tired, mentally. I feel bored easily, I don’t feel passionate about what I do every day and I just feel like dying just to discover whether God exist or not. It’s like I lost my motivation to live and I don’t know what I held on since I started living, having said that nothing major happened to my life but as each month pass by, it gets worse. Don’t really care about things happening around me, habits that I used to have got really dull and I started to question the point of living. Some […]

Well, first, sorry for my bad english…

My life is horrible. I never had nothing… I always be different; In the worst way. When i was a kid, my sister and my cousin excluded me.  My parents always fighting and my father never really like us. He just wanna get out, and one day, he goes. But unfortunately, leave took a long time. All starts bad…

I think that one day, i´ll be happy and that all was just a bad time. But not. Grown up that way destroyed me. I think that i am one of that people who born to never be loved for nobody. I […]