I saw an episode from Monty Python where a man is imprisoned in the Soviet Union, and guards have just grabbed him to take him from his cell to be tortured and executed. Suddenly someone is shaking his shoulder and telling him to wake up. He sees he’s laying in a lawn chair at his own house, and his sweet loving elderly mother is standing over him. He’s so happy, he cries “Mother, thank God! It was all a dream!” and she just gives him a beaming smile and says “oh, no, dear, this is the dream! You’re still back […]

Yesterday was a normal day, Iwas going on with my day like a zombie. I feel so lifeless, like a robot just doing shit. The day before yesterday I slept in my car because I couldnt deal with my brother. I just needed to be alone. So last night I came home to a bunch of notes on my table. No its not even my table.

Heres my living situation, got kicked out of parents house, live with newly wed brother and his wife in their new home, they are over achievers and active people while I am just a bum, I was not allowed to bring […]

I know probably no one will believe this, but this story of a girl who hung herself at age 17 and had a near death experience ( she was hanging for between 8-12 minutes) I found hopeful and encouraging for me personally. It made me think that maybe, just maybe no matter how much of a “nerd” people view me as, no matter what a useless failure I am to everyone, that maybe somehow someone could care for me and love me when no one else does. I just post the link here because maybe it might cheer someone else up who has […]

My parents want me to go somewhere today :/ I really don’t want to do anything besides lay on this floor …. I don’t want to out side or gave to talk to anyone … And all the light -.- how can I posibly hate light thi much I feel like I’m just bitching a bunch. Does anyone have any suggestions? And if I leave my house I can’t txt my gf and I cant be on here then it all gets worse :/ idk what to do I so badly don’t want to leave Plus I have a feeling something really bad is gunu […]

completely lonely but sitting right next to people…*sigh* life must get better at some point

I don’t know who to trust these days.

Seems like everybody in this world knows how to back-stab one another.

I’m living in a world with 7 billion people

And 14 billion faces …

last night i was sitting in bed drawing for my friend and my demons kept calling me fat and shit (which i am) and then the thought of bulemia sufaced….i honestly dont know any more…i plan to kill myself on the 23d…my birthday…i cant wait, what a joy it would be to commit suicide on my
Own
Birthday. Just fun 😉

Is it really fair to my family for them to watch me in pain, to be distant, to hide my depression. When i grew up, my mom and dad divorced. I lived with my mom, she was depressed and threaten to me that she would kill herself. I was only 7 at the time. Every morning waking up and wondering if I was going to lose her.

Now, I’m depressed and I have been wanting to drive my truck 100 mph and run into a telephone poll or something. Is it fair that I make my 6 month old son watch […]

Just returned from my first appointment with my therapist! They said I have a severe anxiety disorder! New meds and weekly visits! Let’s see if this helps **fingers crossed**

– Layne

i m a girl…i dont like my life…my life is a complete shit…i feel like a complete zero and a loser…i dono what to do ..pls help me…my skool life z a shit my coll lif e was yet another shit …i dono for what i m living i couldnt find any gud reason to live…i dont hav happiness in my life at all…my childhood and till 8th grade life was gud…den after that everythin went as a disaster…the ppl i trusted betrayed me and left me…my parents want me to marry now itself…i 20yrs old and i bliv in true relationship nly…around me der […]

Sigh… Best friend swooped in snd saved me -.- I’m still pissed that I woke up today. -.-

I need someone to talk to about Barbiturates. I don’t know if anyone here knows, but I’m very interested in drugs, I’m well educated about a lot of drugs, it’s one of my few interesting interests, which a lot of people look down on, frankly i couldn’t care less.

If you’re educated on barbs and willing to talk to me and answer questions, please comment and I’ll give you my email add.

Thanks in advance.

Okay so apparently my first post was inappropriate for some reason, so I’ll just try again.

If anyone needs someone to talk to, feel free to email me no matter what you need help with or what you wanna talk about, my email will be at the end of this post. Even if you feel there is no hope in life for you, there still is, trust me, you don’t have to walk down the rout I and many other people did, I got help and now I’m not suicidal anymore, I’m still depressed from time to time due to chemical imbalance in the brain and […]

– help family move out: done

– not interfere with father’s birthday (08/13)

– not interfere with mother and brother trip

then I’ll no longer feel like I owe anything to anyone

sick of all the submission to a malevolent elite .. sick of this artificial lifestyle where it’s all about appearances and self-interest

tired of trying to  figure out how to escape all of that other than by dying

this place isn’t where I’m supposed to be .. I just have to let go of the biggest illusion ever, that is to say life matters

All I want is someone to hand me a gun so I can end it and not have to ever celebrate another shitty day again….

the only reason i didnt close the 4 in between me and the ledge of our 3 story roof

was because i didnt want you to have to get caught up when the police come for the body.

screaming and crying and after our blow out

because i cant even function or see myself without you without breaking down

and your aparently so affected by our arguing

that your first thought is to sit and watch porn .

thanks fo not noticing ort checking on me after our fight.

and then

you still expect me to want to have sex with you.

i should  have just jumped.

one way or another i will die if […]

Does He even care what he has done for this world?

All the lies?

All this time?

“God is bold”

“God will Rise.”

“God,waiting for you, has a home.”

Those Christans say,

“Lord’s day.”

But thats not how it is.

God is a *****,

God doesn’t care,

God hates his children,

and what they have become.

Lords day? Fuck you.

He is full of Jealousy.

He throws away The books of common prayers.

How long has it been,

since you seen any site […]