Have you ever wanted to get out of your life? out of your skin?
Why do i have to suffer?

I just want a different life, i want to be happy
i want this pain to go away

I can’t even feel anything anymore, nothing makes me laugh or even smile. I am just a broken mirror, useless and worthless.

I feel cold, joyless, hopeless, helpless and broken
There is no one to talk to ,I’m all alone in this painful world
I just want one day of happiness, just one day in a different life

I want someone to guide me, to hold my hand and take […]

I have been cutting myself all day and I really can’t stop I have tried but I have already cut myself 187 times today and will probably do it again. I have tried distracting myself. Or using a rubber band or ice cube but nothing is working. The some of the cuts are quite deep and some are just enough to bleed I don’t want to go to the hospital but I really can’t stop and some are bad enough to need stitches. I don’t want to tell my family but they do know that I cut. And I am running out of room for […]

Nothing good ever stays with me, it’s as simple as that.  If by chance that something does come into my life that can be viewed as good, it is taken away from me a short while after.  Every single thing that I do is a mistake, I guess that I myself am a mistake.  I can’t even do something as simple as killing myself right, every single time I always end up failing.  Why can’t I just die?   I’m tired of living, and experiencing everything that is apart of this world.  All of the good is overtaken by the bad in this world, and i’m completely […]

The anger boils within my blood, run through, my veins and pumps through my heart. I have reached my max i will not take anymore am not five and i will not be treated as such . I have done everything i was asked to do, i am obedient and kind ,but yet they keep me trapped here like a dog in a cage. I dont go out and lime with friends because they dont wish it i only try to a good child but not anymore i have my own life and i will fight for my rights as long as there is breath […]

This song is just pretty hopeful and inspiring, so maybe it might be good for some of you. I don’t know, it’s just that I find that at times, just the right song can turn things around, if only for just a few minutes whilst it plays.

Yours Truly by Paradise Fears:

Yours Truly

What have I bought into
My world is sprilling out of control
And all that I can turn to
Is that habit in control
My life is not my own
And yet I come back time again
And yet I know I’m crucufied
I know this thing must end
And when will I but learn
When will I be justified
And when will I be free
From this sin I can’t abide
And yeat I lead myself
Into temptation now and then
And still I’ll aways be indebted
Time and time again

Starting off im a male, 21 years old, names not important. Basically my story is my life isnt as bad as others im sure of that but yet I feel this tremendous pain inside me. Im currently in college to become an architect best in my class and have already had job offers. All this but I come from a not so nice family wanted to get away from them ive had problems with this in the past I’ve been to therapy for this whole wanting to commit suicide since I was young about 13. Its a little funny cause my parents used to […]

I would happily die for anyone. I would happily sacrifice my life for the life of another without a second thought. Yeah, there’s loads in my life worth dying for; but there’s very little worth living for. But does that matter? I suppose I should just embrace the fact that although it’s not a lot to live for and the temptation’s always there, there is something keeping me here, there must be something worth living for or else I wouldn’t still be here. I believe that. I really believe that. And that gives me a bit more strength and reminds me that although it all […]

I’m tired. That’s all, just tired – of everything. I’ve carried a diagnosis of depression for a long time, but I’ve always managed to keep going in spite of it. Not anymore. I’m just too tired.  I don’t think many people understand what it means to be tired like this -  it isn’t the ‘I need to take a nap or get a good night’s sleep’ kind of tired – no, this is a bone-deep, soul-weary, insidious form of torment, an uncertain affliction of indeterminate etiology and obfuscate symptomatology;  a weariness that persists and will not abate.

I want it over. I don’t want ‘help’, I’ve […]

I try to get help, like everyone says to. I try to tell people about how i feel, they dont listen. I try to use music, but its not enough. The only thing that ever seems to be enough is a blade. Not because it feels good, or because i like to watch myself bleed, because it seems like its the only thing that ever listens to me. For once, i can take my mind off not being oerfect enough, or pretty enough, and i can focus on a other type of pain. Release. Everyone seems to care so much about themselves. All my friends […]

Warning: rant from top of my head. Might randomly skip to from topic to topic.

When I was in eight grade, I thought I knew what long lasting pain and depression were. I had grown up in a “broken” home, I was bullied, I had been cheated on and my brother nearly died from a suicide attempt. I can remember sitting next to his bed and even after I found out he was going to survive, I kept thinking things couldn’t get worse than that. Since then (3 or so years ago), I have been in a abusive relationship, cheated on again lost a friend who […]

I know there is a bad economy.i know my family isnt one anymore.i know my eldest brother died trying to build the family a good future.and i know i might never know how it feels to be loved.but i dont care.i dont care because nobody cares.nobody give a fuck about me.i am one worthless ************.and thats the only reason why when i see people turn their back on me.i hate myself for a while and move on.i know my entire family is broke and i know the world is not a place for our kind.i dont belive in hope or a bright future.’cus the only […]

I pop on most days to work on a project, or to write a reply. Some days I’ll just read quietly. I speak up when I have something to share but I realize my voice just like before doesn’t mean much.

When I was younger I was a listener and I was forced to be a talker. To be a talker to make myself clear and to stop assumptions about me.

A phrase rings through my head “You can’t be a hero” at 12 years old my father did everything to crush my hopes. I did little things, I donated a little money, I held open […]

I just wanted to cut myself, nothing special I do it daily.. This time I went too deep the blood won’t stop I can feel the life pouring out of me. What do I do now? I don’t want to go back to hospital but I need help and I need to now .

It’s getting harder, I’ve been thinking about killing myself non stop since yesterday. The pain is pouring from my viens in small amounts for now but its not enough, theres so much more to come. I’m looking in the mirror and I know what I have to do to finally get some peace, I tried to turn a corner in my life but there is none, I tried to get better but theres no hope. I just wanted to be happy for once, is that too much to ask for? I just want to join you in death, I love you so much and without […]

They say that we’re a long time dead, but it seems to me that we’re alive for a lot longer. And yet this narrow bridge between two unfathomable eternities is the only metric of our lives. Tiresome to love, or be loved or even just to keep going on in the face of the over whelming pointlessness of it all. I can’t have what I want, but I can chose to do something about it if I have the courage.
Edit:
Thinking about courage… I can clearly see three kinds. Intellectual, physical and emotional. I sometimes want to die because I have no more emotional […]

I’ve lost hope, guys.
I have been abused by two different men.. (My mother’s boyfriends)
I’m absolutely in love with this boy, who doesn’t feel the same way towards me. I don’t blame him, though. I fucking hate myself. I hate myself so much. I’m ugly, I have no talent, I’m worthless.
Every day, I think to myself how people wouldn’t even care if I were to die.
I don’t care if I die, actually I want to be dead..
I have attempted suicide by overdosing. I overdosed because I wanted a little longer to tell someone that I love them.
To hear them say […]

Gogol (OST “Paris, je taime”)

Warning: May Ramble
Note: as I type this, I feel calm and acceptance of this

For the past five days, I felt a lot like Noble Six. Crap starts showing up, the ones you’re freinds with are gone, and you’re stuck dealing with a Massive amount of problems.

Unlike Spartan B-312 though, I wasn’t fighting Covenant to save others, I was fighting to save myself. If for no other reason than to fufill a random dream; that of me helping others ready to quit, helping them back on their feet to fight back against the crappy dog-eat-dog world of today.

The past five days were my worst; always […]

How do you really start something you feel inside and just want to vocalize? There is really no reasoning for any of this, I have made my decision, I just feel it will take a lot off my shoulders until then. I do have those around me who I can talk to but no one I can tell what I’m really feeling and the decision I’ve made. My plan is to next week once I can afford all of  the equipment and means I need necessary is to make an exit bag, buy a canister of Helium, buy a  regulator with tubing, and rent a […]