hey anyone hear from lifeishorribe lately??? i haven’t heard from him in awhile and kinda worried…

hey guys haven’t been on in forever…so things are starting to look better, me and my parents are getting along better and last week the guy i like asked me out and is now my boyfriend 🙂 so why do i feel like I’m waiting for the floor to fall through???  because when things seem too good to be true it cuz it is….right?

Anyone hear from AtTheEnd? been missing him… a lot..

I know it’s long. Short version is at the bottom.

I don’t even know why I came here… I pretty much know what I plan to do, and more or less why to do it. I guess I want to let my story be known anonymously to somebody. Part of the issue of not being to tell people is the reason why I’ve cut ties with my family (which I will discuss here) – and thus going to a cycle of alienating those who may have been willing to care in the first place.
So my method of choice – in keeping with my lifes choices […]

Its kind of ironic when I think about it… How the only thing that keeps me from making the leap is the thought of those Id leave behind and their pain.  Yet where are they when Im feeling this low? They arent even here to support me yet I only think of them and how they feel.  I dont know. Maybe they just dont understand because they dont have these feelings and thoughts and lows.  I only want to be free from this pain and confusion and to find someone who understands the way I feel.  I feel so alone and isolated.  Being understood is […]

(A poem I wrote about a girl who is deeply in love being stood up)

At the risk of a wait

She put on her lipgloss
and fastened her dress
preparing for the date
with the man she loved best

she curled up her hair
and polished her nails
she felt like a princess
in those princessy tales

she looked beautiful
the mirror agreed
she just kept on saying
can’t believe he picked me

as she stared at the clock
her smile could not fade
he had picked her
at the risk of a wait

and she waited and watched
as minutes passed by
maybe he’d come
just a few minutes […]

It's one of my better pictures I guess…thank you effects.

Been thinking and feeling things that even I’m surprised about 🙁

I live in a spiritual community and I finally realize how unhealthy this whole place is. There is no love here everyone here is so judgmental and fake. Its all political. You go away for a while and no one greets you with even just a smile when you come back.

I only feel good now when I am on my meds, and they always wear off in time.

I’m in hell. My boss here is a manipulative a-hole who has no boundaries. I had to tell him I needed to go to the hospital.When I came back, he asked me how it was in front of […]

I’m alone. once again,not the first time. Have nothing to live for. not a care.  After you’ve gone through hell heaven seems like a better place. What am I supposed to do. I just wan to die. but i don’t want to be a coward ughh! someone kill me !

I feel like I have no more life left to bother living for.

I am 40 years and divorced for over a year.  I have two boys that I had no choice but to let them live with their mother — thanks to the state since fathers have no rights.

Otherwise I have nothing to complain about.  I have a great job, have enough money even after the ridiculous amount of child support I pay, I live in a nice house way too big for one person, I am educated with a Masters degree, and have some friends.  I gained a lot of weight due to medical […]

I’ve Been Wanting To Die Since My Parents Committed Suicide.They Would Kill Themselves For Each Other But Not For Me. I Keep Thinking Of How It Would Feel I Died,How It Would Effect Other People. I Thrive On Pain,But How Can I Feel And See Their Pain If I’m Dead?I Don’t Know,But One Way Or Another Ill Make Them Pay,Two Birds With One Stone. I Stay Alive And Taunt My Parents With Depression And Ending Any Love,While I Feed On My Own Tormented Thoughts And Hurt The Ones Close To Me. I Want To Feel Their Sadness Breathing On My Neck And The Lust For My Life. […]

Just a dumb poem I wrote

‘Stop pushing me away’
It’s just something they always say
But please
Understand
It’s something I must do
Before they get the chance
To leave me too

I cannot comprehend
Why the real ones come back
Why the true ones keep trying
Can’t they see that I’m lying?

Can’t they see that the mask I wear
The walls I put up
Cover something useless and hollow
Not worth knowing at all

But the real ones come back
The true ones keep trying
And I’m tired of fighting
Done pushing away
But I can’t let them in
I will not let them through

I can’t

Hi,
I don’t really want to write my story here, but for a long time I’ve wanted somebody to talk with… Preferably someone older. I don’t know why; I’d just be more comfortable. 🙂 Anyway, I’d like someone to talk with, and I’ve always been too scared to ask. I have social anxiety, severe at the moment, and even online I’m badly anxious talking to people. But I’d like to be there for people who need someone to talk to, even if it’s just once, or whenever you need to vent. If you need someone to talk about anything with, I’d really like for it […]

I miss what I once had. I miss it so much, and for years those feelings have consumed me, and they have taken over me until I was no longer me at all. I have blamed so many people for my own problems, and I have lived my short life hating almost everyone who has come into my life. I have caused so many people pain because I let my feelings get the better of me. I have pinned my suicidal thoughts and actions on specific people. I have blamed past experiences for the depression that now consumes me. I have blamed my birth defect […]

I’m high and really suicidal right now. I think I’m gonna go and find something to kill myself with. That or plan to. I’m a wretch and I lose all my friends. I don’t deserve to live nor do I want to live. To much hurt and pain.

My mother: she is a mean person. I don’t mean mean like most teenagers do when they say stuff like: “God my mom is so mean she took my phone”. She is horrible to me I get told at least once a week that I am horrible, I am stupid, I don’t deserve to have her love, and I am the worst daughter in the world. I stem the pain of her words with physical pain, pain that I can control. I live a constant lie and I hate every second of it. Every Monday I feel like SHIT and I go to school anyway […]

i guess thoughts o f suicide have never been far away all my adult life

Grew up in a dysfunctional family which contributed to me never really having friends. Stumbled around drunk & drugged through late teens and early twenties.

Years go by, I function, work, stopped using any drugs and cut back on the booze. Worked, cleaned myself up and learnt to appear a regular guy… Met lots of people through work and had brief relationships but nothing ever stuck and I never seemed to form lasting friendships…

About three years ago through a set of stupid circumstances all my own making I faced financial ruining, on […]

In those eyes, is the truth.

I can count it even 3 if the flat tire would not have happen. Today was the most serious attempt of them all, before i just attached the rope on the tree and put the knot over my neck, but today i jumped and stroke the ground. 2 of the branches broke and i was up on my toes with failed attempt. Then i tried to put the rope higher and i failed again because some mother f***er drove on the road with his dirt bike and i had to came down and drive away because i think he had called me cops or something. […]