I visited SP last year but was afraid because I wasn’t sure if I was heading towards the right direction. I was really confused and unsure of my life. But a lot has happened in 12 months and I feel like I can relate to the other people on this site. I don’t want to end my life but fix it and make it better.
Tag:
12 Months
A couple of years ago i was classed as clinically depressed, they thought i was schizophrenic and i have been trying to end my life for about two years now, all attempts have failed for one reason or another.
In the last 12 months i have had to deal with 3 close friends and a close familiar dying, with me not being allowed to attend 2 of the funerals. All of that is on top of me not having slept a full night in over a year as I’m plagued by nightmares every single night.
After the last one i vowed to try and get […]
I’ve been stuggling with mental health problems for a few years now. Although its only been this month that I’ve sought help.
My suicide story starts the day my depression began. I was 17 when my ‘best friend’ was beaten up by a group of asian lads. My friend went to the police but was told there was nothing they could do. A couple of weeks later my friend and I were in the same area and my friend spotted one of the lads who beat him up ( using glass bottles). I walked over to the lad and punched him. So hard he was […]
I’ve been reading through a lot of posts over the last few days and I have too say get a grip Some of you. I’m 34 years old and reading some of the comments on here you really don’t have a clue. I’ve been there as a 14 year old and the girl that I love so much has split up with me so I slit my wrists. At 15 I got started on by 7 people my own age and all I could do was run away as fast as I could or literally get kicked to death. I was so ashamed to run […]
Note: I am home now, I wrote the following earlier this evening.
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I am glad I did this test run. I encountered a few issues. Technology related issues. I had hoped to make this post on site, but I think I have broken my phone. It won’t tether to my laptop. :\ I will have to get that fixed. Then, there’s the little issue of very sketchy mobile coverage. I am basically in a hole in the ground.
I am writing this on site and saving it to upload when I get home. I am listening to my final mix tape. The first track, “The Other […]
It’s plain and simple, I am hurt. I don’t know whether to
call it depressed, bipolar or maybe even suicidal. I don’t fit fully into one
of those categories. After all I see my emotions as a vase; One that’s cracked and
overfilled, but painted over and glued to hide the unwanted things. Every time
something emotional happens it feels like someone took my vase and slammed it
down on a table, causing the fragile makeover to shatter, letting a cascade of
water to spill through. Of course then I have to scurry and pick up all the pieces
and carefully repaint every little detail […]
Thursday morning… This existence is painful, I cant take it anymore. I have no friends all of them have betrayed me, or fucked me over. My family offers no support with anything that I’ve ever done. Every girl I’ve ever met has used me, cheated on me, then got their new boyfriends to bash me. I was abused as a child by step father, and abandoned my real father. Every choice I’ve ever made has been wrong in someones eyes. My best friend overdosed on ice, and has been in a psych ward for the past 3 years, he doesn’t even know who I am. […]