I answered;
the scariest part
is not the feeling of loneliness
o the darkness that fills you
despite the looming pain of emptiness
the scariest part
is the realization
that you have lost yourself
completely
sinking as you lay awake at 2am
because you lost the ability to sleep
and you can’t even cry
because you don’t even care
This is by far the best song that I listen too through my daily struggle in this world I listen to it when I’m speeding in the highway. At work everywhere you guys will love it especially the drop at 2:09, 2:52, 4:20 & 5:05 that beat is ridiculous this is the song I’ll never be able to post a better one than this DRAGONFLY that’s exactly what I see especially when I drive. Fastest I ever went with this song was 198mph on a 2am night of Christmas 2015 yes 198mph is the fastest I ever went in my life I won’t say where […]
Here I am at nearly 2am, still watching boring tv, still wide awake.
Ive already taken 10 mercyndol in hopes that it will make me sleepy & dull jy back pain, but all I have is a headache!
Gahh why can’t I sleep?!
Im seeing them again.. the three black circals that cloud my vision…. I wanna cut so badly.. i was using my coping skills again tonight its 2am here. My most useful coping skill at the moment is drawing. My mom (step mom)Â came over to check on me i asked to have more paper. She said no that i need to stop distracting myself and get to sleep.. i just wanted to scream.
She’s the person who doesnt get it most of all. She’s super religious. She doesnt get that im bisexual. I’m just “in a phase” . […]
This one’s pretty long, sorry if I bore anyone. I should preface by saying that I’ve been depressed for four years. I was formally diagnosed with major depressive disorder January of this year, but I knew long before. I’ve never had a true friend, anything even close to a relationship (been led on a few dozen times), and I feel alone constantly. Recently my diagnosis was changed to suggest the cause of my pain is ADD. I’m not sure if the doctors are right, but amphetamines are helping a bit lately. This is the story of the last eight months or so, from the first […]
I’m 28 years old and my life is a complete waste. I am the youngest of six children, there’s a seven year gap between me and the rest, the eldest of my siblings being sixteen years older than I am. (just giving you the background here).
Life in my family was never easy, we were considered free labor, we cleaned the house, cooked the meals, did the laundry, kept the yard did the shopping and washed my dad’s collection of cars. These chores started as young as five years of age, we’d walk two miles to the nearest supermarket, and then carry the groceries home, this […]
I feel like I’m preparing to kill myself without even trying. My depression is getting worse and worse. I don’t take any meds except 5-htp, this natural supplement and who the fuck knows if it even works. I definitely feel hopeless. I’m alone. All my friends moved away and have lives and I’m just their facebook friend now. So, I deleted my facebook. I was active on blogtv and had friends there, so I deleted that. All I’ve kept is twitter and skype to talk to my online girlfriend but she’s getting fed up with my negativity and falling asleep while skyping. She’s 3 hours […]
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