Today I almost broke up with my boyfriend because I feel that every time he sees me crying for no reason, every day I can’t go to school because I can’t get out of bed, every time he sees a new scar on my wrist, it hurts him. I can see the tears he holds back or the pain in his eyes every time he looks at me. Sometimes he holds me very close to him because he fears that I’m suddenly going to disappear into thin air. He’s the first person I decided to trust with the secrets I had never told anyone else, […]
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I’ve been on here since 2011, but recently made this account after not being on here for 5 months, fresh start 🙂
I come back and Bam! I don’t get this format AT ALL. please help
When I look in the mirror,
I don’t see me
I see failure and no beauty,
I see ugliness and sorrow
I used to be so happy
A bubbly joyful girl
I used to be excited for school and my friends
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Now I dread seeing myself
I fear breakfast and tea
I know my friends watch me
To make sure that I eat
They scan my arms everyday
Checking for new cuts
Their faces falling at the sight of crusted blood
I know they’re disappointed
I see it in their eyes
Some seem to understand
Some over-react
Some look disgusted when I show them the scars
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Long sleeve t-shirts are the new ‘in thing’ for me
Jeans with pockets to hide my fingers
Rough […]
Yes I am a cutter it’s how I deal with certain major problems a few months ago my life was going great now it’s taken a turn for the wiser my emotions are like a land mine and it dosent take much to trigger them if you don’t know me by now I’m Jason or Day whichever you want to call me is fine. I have been suicidal at a very young age and it’s only gotten worse I have drank so many chemicals in attempts to a true release but all have failed I always end up throwing the chemicals back up i am […]
You know what I hate so much? When people know that a person is suicidal, self harming, or even really just feeling down, and some asshole thinks it’s alright to push it even deeper. When I was in 7th grade, I was suicidal. This girl was talking shit behind my back about how she was only pretending to be my friend. That- ugh! It’s horrible! Even now, I’m dealing with depression, suicidal thoughts, self harm, and anxiety. And I still get that kind of bullshit! My cousin, knows that it irritates me when he hits me. He hits me on my upper arm, which is […]
please, anyone here that is even suicidal or slightly suicidal, or even not, or just needing someone to talk to, please send me an email. I want to be a friend to you and to try to offer you advice for a blessed life. I am not so old or wise, just 22, but I am pained at reading so many of these posts and I have it in me to be encouraging. I am not acting like I am some kind of suicide hotline but I know those hotlines cannot help to fill the void. please give me an opportunity to encourage you and be […]
I’m running away from people again.
First time I didn’t have any friends. So it was ok if they didn’t talk to me since I didn’t talk to them.
This time I’ve met so many nice people, but I even catch myself saying  ‘I’m late, we’ll catch up later, right?’ and almost literally running.
I’m out of facebooks and whatsapp groups. I wait some hours or days to text someone back.
Inside, there is that famous phrase ‘help me!’ screaming in repeat. They even know I’m not fine and they want to talk, to make me feel better. So why do I run when I have […]
please, anyone here that is even suicidal or slightly suicidal, or even not, or just needing someone to talk to, please send me an email. I want to be a friend to you and to try to offer you advice for a blessed life. I am not so old or wise, just 22, but I am pained at reading so many of these posts and I have it in me to be encouraging. I am not acting like I am some kind of suicide hotline but I know those hotlines cannot help to fill the void. please give me an opportunity to encourage you and be […]
I’m just tired.
I’m just sad.
I’m just angry.
Today at school, some Christian told me i wasn’t going to heaven. Just because i don’t believe in Jesus. I do believe in God, though. But she doesn’t seem to understand that. Then after that, a friend of mine told me she had gone to the guidance office with one of my other friends. Extremely concerned on what happened, i asked why. They told me, it was for me. Some “preps” were talking about me behind my back, during gym today. They were saying that me and my girlfriend weren’t really in love, that we were […]
I know that my life has become pure suffering, all my dreams, all my fears, all the passion and all the devotion are now smashed into shards.However, I started to remember everything with joy and nostalgia … my memories are coming back in flashes : the way I used to sit and stare at a tree; the taste of my favourite ice cream; how funny it was to play with my friends in my childhood…
I’ve lived for so long.17 years.It’s curious to think that there are people who want to live for 100 years, and I’m unhappy enough with 17.It was a life.I’ve […]
I’ve been depressed on and off for about four years. I was in love with a good guy friend of mine. He moved away for a year and began dating his childhood best friend. About a year later I met a guy I liked. He was smart and funny in a dorky way. Things got complicated and it didn’t work out. This is when I first began to experience my depression. I listened to music most of the time, slept long hours, and neglected my homework and chores. I became a recluse. For months I was in a haze, but one day I snapped out […]
Me and my boyfriend *gasp* i know, i know why is this little ***** complaining about how life hates her, when she has a boyfriend that loves her?
1. I Feel numb, but he gives me some feeling back
2. He makes me smile and laugh, but I’m still not happy
3. He holds me when I’m crying, but I’m always crying
but the sad truth is my internet friends is that I don’t love him; I don’t even know if i like him. I mean he is the nicest guy you could meet, and he’s handsome, but I don’t know how I feel […]
Ignore me like disease
A ghost you choose not to see
Pretend I’m not there because
Shortly I won’t be
Maybe you thought I was stronger
That I could live through it
That the lies you spoke no longer linger
And instead I found peace
But you’re wrong, dead wrong
I’m just better at hiding it
The pain you put me through
Gave me much needed guidance
Trust no one
Believe in nothing
And the day will soon come
Where you feel nothing
No pain, no hurt, no sorrow
Maybe emptiness is a better way of living
Keep my heart beating is all you asked […]
well, this sucks. I can’t go to anyone. And I’ve been clean for so many months now and I really don’t want to go back. Someone saw me writing on here and I don’t know. Just don’t feel safe again. I feel like I’m gonna do something to myself if I’m ever alone
There is no excerpt because this is a protected post.
It’s Friday
Her alarm goes off at 6:00am…she hits the snooze button. “I do not want to get up today.” She pulls the cover over her face and falls back asleep until 7:00am.
She finally gets the energy to get up out of bed and drags herself into the shower, and begins to get ready for school. As she’s getting ready she occasionally looks out the window – the fog is rolling in and its windy. She sighs deeply inside…”I don’t want to go to school today”. Putting on her make up, she gives up halfway and gets dressed. With the little energy she has, she throws her […]
Okay… abyssal. My atomic cry. You, reader; unknown other champion of the “Present.” Your saber of light will ingnite, or let me die. Whoever you may be, in the land of Gotham City. Light to the light, reaching to the outers limit. Dr. Faith.
by Bisban
written by Bisban
No more herb, and forever.
No more green ignition. Will the Joker have the last laugh.
I, versus Lobo’s chain and Deathstroke’s Claymore.
Back to the place where “simple,” beaten to a bloody death.
Attempting words, into the lost façade. Fade. No echo.
The cry of the millennium.
In arms chain, and iron mask. A bodied spirit.
The Lucifer. Crucified upside-down.
The Bringer Of Light. The hidden suffer. The secret truth.
A sad child of Satan world. This is the voice of the “New Age,” dying.
The preach, sabotaged.
My humble children. Our mothers of life.
Change, why does it not. Grace is dead.
The truth, […]
I can’t hold the things I feel inside any longer I ditched school so Ican be alone so no one can bother me but it just caused more trouble.. I feel like a burden to my sisters to my brothers to my parents I can’t stay happy Cus when I am the thoughts jut flow back in those negative dark thoughts ..
the other night I was crying
and thinking about dying
I grabbed my knife and felt the familiar sting from my addiction to cutting.
i laid back and I felt dizzy. probably from the blood I lost.
looked down at my arms and legs and wondered who could love a girl like me.
then my beautiful little cat snuggled up against my cut up arm gently. put her paw against them and laid there until I stopped crying. like she knew what was going on. like she knew I needed any kind of comfort in that moment.
maybe if my cat can still love me there’s hope for people to.
Home for a 3-day weekend. Last time it was a week and I was left entertaining and flirting with the concept of death. Anything, really, to keep from having to take part in the shameful charade any longer. You come home. We sit in front of the TV, we ignore and tune each other out as we stare listlessly at the screen for hours on end.
Is that all that life has become for you? Don’t you want to talk about anything of substance, anything at all? Why can’t you just be civil for once? Why is every word out of your mouth an insult, a […]