Can this pen bring you to me? Pushed away from the freeze…and the long hanging feelings that call out for freedom.
Will this time stand aside, this time took from me just to give it all back again?
Is it right to cry? Is it right to cry for me? Said, this fight might be ours but it all falls to a place that we’ve failed to see.
And so, she lifts me
And so, she lifts me
That’s right, she lifts me now..if you can’t see for yourself..see?
I couldn’t hold back those dreams..cause you were there begging me so nice. And I still […]
I think there is a song out there to describe just about any situation.
Never will I forget my black diamond, whom I loved so much.. <3
Black bass. Black race. The gothic empire, the last in dire. The devour, of all, has settled. The sound of the new age, before, the march of the horse. The next one thousand years. Evolve me. To fight back. To die for it. The predecessors have all been taken. Tears and love, Princess Diana. The cannon. The lion. The sabre of light; the ultimate hope. You, too. Now we know, a group of killer narcissist does not want to lose control. Pig-head monsters. I am the undertaker, call me the stone cold stunner. We will go right under. […]
I wonder if I’m mad.
At times I feel so content with life
and the next moment I’m loathing it.
I want to be special, that elite, that genius, that child prodigy,
And yet when I look back ,
all I want is a simple life , a simple home, and experience that simple happiness.
Depressing thoughts come swiftly in my mind,
whispering such tempting and soothing threats,
and only with it do I feel alive.
Am I twisted, a lunatic , a mad man for thinking such a thing?
It feels as though despair has becomed my only friend.
And without it I feel incomplete.
Despair, it is the black of the night,
and the night of […]
I felt life should end upon the last argument with my spouse, who accused me of thinking I’m superior to him, that I look down on hime because he is a black man, despite that we share the same race; and finally, calling me the b-word, saying f- you over and over again, telling me to go to hell, and calling me a drug addict and racist. I do not take any drugs. My life as you can all see, is a nightmare, and death will be a mighty fine relief. If you are a friend of mine, please look out for my daughter. I […]
Open them pig jowl’s up for me so I can force feed you the dirtiest and the foulest of truth.
The sickness begins in dreams. They nail you into place and lie and say “You can be anything you want to” and I hate you and I hate myself for believing it.
Truth is, dreams don’t come true and the only time you get your name in the paper is when you die! Obituaries, Gossip Column’s and the Entertainment page is all the same and to see it you just half to read between the […]
I need to flee SoCal.
I am the black dragon.
To heal my wound scales.
The faith, where is the wagon.
Twelve, the number is zero.
Now, in the age of oblivion.
Yet to be, another hero.
Welcome, our faith of destruction.
Fate, have you ever heard of the undead.
I live, here I am. Messiah in the dark, read my palm.
The heart of the ultimate scale, inside of me.
A turbulent chaotic beast, the rage of hell.
Peace like a saint.
Faith is my sword. My rotting flesh, sworn to be vowed.
Like Cyclops, inborn half-man and half-weapon.
My mission. My battle. My war. Forever until […]
This might seem different than most of the posts I make, or everybody else makes for that matter. I recently read something on depression and it mentioned how it’s very difficult to get back to or even remember how you were before your depression. You lose yourself and the lucky ones that get over their depression, don’t always know what kind of people they are, what their personality was like.
My question for you is, before this black monster crawled on top of your shoulders, what were you like?
im aaaaaaaalllllllllll alone with rare health problems and bipolar. aaaaalllllllll alone. hopeless and poooor. cant have kids, no sex drive, ED, tired. Went to college and poor. im black. did i mention i was poor? aaaaaaaaaaaaallllllllll alone. no sex drive. low testosterone. bipolar. cant keep a job. aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaalllllllllllll alone. no woman for me. im crazy. i wont live life anymore in a sick mind and broken body. i hate being black. im gonna die
Finally I can have this back. Finally got *him* to leave this alone. God where the hell do I start? I was in the bathroom one day and I just filled up the tub. No bubbles. No nothing. It’s not like I was trying to have a bubble bath. And I got in and went underwater. As long as I could. Knowing that I’ll struggle and finally come up for air once I can’t take anymore. But I wanted to suffer. Feel me black out. I sat there for 2 hours of just complete silence. I’ve had a relapse and it’s horrible.
It’s like I’m destined to feel this desperate and guilty my whole life. Jesus please save me, help me, show me, do something to let me know you’re there and not just a story for us to feel good about. I want to meet you when I die, not a black void.
To all of the ass holes, the miscreants and the filth out there sounding the earth I’m done, I don’t need to be hear anymore. You along with many other things have pushed me to the edge then when I’m grasping on to the cliff for dear life you stomp on my hands, I hqve things to tell you before I am gone, I’m sick and tiers of your comments and your judgements, all If your discrimination and lies, I AM GAY, I AM A NERD, And you know what YOUR AN ASSHOLE. if you think you can judge people because they like someone of […]
because my problems are so contrast.
through this hell I became born. a contra warrior.
I am the dead Ash. The story of the black ash.
the story where at the end the sad hero.
what happened when it reached zero.
was there another realm. or did I fuse with Gengar.
what is the psychic world. I am a Gengar.
I can levitate and fly. I have psy-power.
I can control and manipulate things and matter, and even people.
A freaking Gengar. What in the psychic world.
There used to be a Gengar, when he found the holy spirit.
Together, they went to go save the world.
Alakazam, is the guru of peace.
I type with […]
2 Tuesdays ago I accidently bet 33 black and won. I was playing bitcoin roulette. I thought I was betting odd. It won a near max bet and I won 1500 worth. I proceeded to gamble that into 10,000 dollars over the last weeks. I have won about 17,000 dollars profit worth of bitcoin this year. I was able to pay many debts. My girlfriend told me I’m a part of her. It means the world to me. I wish I was dead. I wish I was dead. I’m basically broke. I was in all kinds of debt. Now I’m just broke. I wish I […]
hitting out of a leaf spiff.
the music cycles through the zodiac.
it seems at the end, we have lost.
only me. staring at the cat.
the bunny bit me, and I bled.
the purple sky turns the water red.
devil shines through the mind.
what is your color of black.
on to the next tract. what will be.
in the hands of faith.
the moon and the night.
in darkness. the story of the lost knight.
death. a horsemen.
seems like we hold a chain, all of us.
exiled from the mystical realm.
i am losing.
it’s scary
not knowing what’s on the other side
not knowing how the exit will go
some claim to know the answer
but they profess their belief and not a fact
in my mind it swirls
will i be in pain?
will i linger?
i imagine all black on the other side
no feeling, no emotion, no individual consciousness
there’s no joy or accomplishment or love
but there’s no fear or pain or anger either
i would make that trade
the grass does seem greener on that other side
am i wrong?
can i do better for myself over here?
the neutrality of death is appealing
on this side i’m a pessimist
over there it’s not possible
while all of experience might be expressed […]
Have you ever heard that saying..”Karma is a *****?” I been hearing that all my 19 years of my life so far and i actually agree with it. It is a fucken ***** -_-. Im not your typical ” Black girl” people call me a “white chocolate person” or ” oreo” because im not rude or disrespectful or all in your face about everything. i was bullied hardcore about myself. i dont like hip hop or rap, i dont braid hair and all that stereotype shit. it might shock you that im a vegetarian. aha yeah i can see why people call me the names […]
you come
crying
and eating
growing
your halo of gold
i take it
i steal you away chil’
to my palace
in the darkness
i shape you
molded clay
becoming
red and black
devil chil’
you are mine
now go
out into the sun
into the moonlight
break them chil’
tear them
kill their babies
poison their water
burn their crops
break the glass
shattering
make them crumble
give them
infernal fire
watch
as they turn to ash
go forth chil’
leave your chocolate behind
and become the devil
this world will end
you are
darkness
my creation
burn them all
The only person that ever cared about me is gone. The person I was going to run away with abd love forever is dead. He loved me for me I didn’t have to be who anyone else wanted to be I was good enough for him. I can go on in life without him. I spend days thinking about our memories and I have fantasies about you riding up the street on your black motorcycle saying †wherever you want to go I’ll take you†I miss you just holding me while we talk about anything and everything the different countries we were going to […]
it’s an interesting genre of music, but this is my favorite song within it.
As a sufferer of bad GAD and social anxiety, having to ride the bus out to college was extremely stressful and at times distressing as my anxiety would flare up real bad. But this song helped me at least enjoy the view out the window in the early morning with the sun painting the sky a brilliant orange. Unless it was winter. Then the sky was shitty and black.
Lol, well, I hope you at least enjoy this song.