Oh come on, you can tell me, I’m this random person on the internet who you’ll never meet right? Wrong. For all we know we’re bumping into each other regularly but we don’t know, why? Because this thing inside us all doesn’t have a face besides ours. We give it life, a body, and a soul to torture. I know I do. I’ve met people out there who I’d love to have a deep conversation with but the thing is that isn’t an option for a great majority of us. Most of us go floating through our lives until we bump into another, like abandoned […]
Tag:
body
I ran across these two posts today, and I thought that they were really moving.
Even when I wanted to die, to kill myself
To rip each cell of my being apart, not once,
Not ever, did I miss a piece of homework.
Or fail a test or skip an hour-long lesson.
Sure, I skipped three meals a day but at least
I had my priorities straight.
I see these kids walking in front of me to school.
I see them, and they are zombies.
Blank faces, I doubt they’ve slept,
Probably up all night doing that essay
They forgot to do because their parents
Asked them to […]
Hey guys sorry I haven’t been writing on here in a while. My junior year of college started a few weeks ago. This past weekend was rough 2nd E.R. visit in two months ( both for different reasons), feeling shitty, Accidentally cut my foot open when I bumped into a glass candle while shopping at bath and body works. The bottom end of it landed on my left foot broken part down. Thank goodness it only left a small scar on my foot, ended up being betrayed by a friend at church that I thought I could trust. Now I keep seeing photos and statuses […]
Normal. Kissing a man. Normal. Friends. Body contact/hugs, kisses. Normal. Couple with a baby. Normal. Walking up the stairs, riding a bike, doing sports. Normal. Mother, father, family. Normal. Driving a car. Being slim. being blonde. Fuck the media, the picture you are showing us is “NORMAL”. Normal. Normal. Normal. I am SICK of this normal world!!!
Empty from crying. Tomorrow to work again. smile, you’re on camera. being watched. don’t cry in public – you may be considered as being mentally ill in this society.
I have the easiest wish a human being can have. Somebody LOVE me. Someone, anyone, lay your arms around me and […]
runs through my body. You give me a dirty look, I hate you, you fuck with me, I hate you, you wrong me in anyWAY and I will see that my vengeance towards you will be swift and painful. I am a ticking time bomb and one of these days one of these fuckers in my life that I have to deal with is gonna cross me the wrong way, and that’s when the shit will hit the fan. Watch the fuck out, my patience is running out :)..
Not that I think of suicide. Its just that part of life where nothing excites me. I feel no enthusiasm for anything that i can do. Tell me if this feeling is normal so i can keep my sanity in check.
18 here
I wish I would die, that my body would just give out or some freak accident will happen to take me out. I’ve wondered if I could go to a bad area at night and coax someone into shooting me in the head. I feel like placing personal ads saying it’s a last ditch effort before I kill myself, because people need to be taught a fucking lesson about not completely fucking with others feelings.
my body shakes and i cry. he didnt deserve the way i treated him, i hurt everyone around me. i push people awy but he never left he always stayed by my side untill the day i broke him. I’ve never seen so much pain on someones face, and im just now getting upset over it. all it took was one look at his photo and i completely lost it. it doesnt help that i see him almost everyday. my chest hurts, everything hurts.
The moment you put a gun to your head and debate if your life is worth living through all the hard times is when you’ve hit the bottom. I’m sitting alone because no one can do anything to help me anymore. I can’t help myself anymore. I’ve tried for better days but it seems that my days keep getting worste. I’m tired, my body is tired of taking the pain that the world is throwing at me. You think divide is selfish? What is selfish is the people in this world pushing people to the point of sucked. I’m not going to discuss problems on […]
I am nearing my point in which I will be ready to end it. Long story short I am a miserable dissapointment and life would be better for all that I loved if I were gone. I have made my arrangements and have financial taken care of (almost) for my children and girlfriend/fiance. No one knows that I am on my way out,and I would like to keep it that way. My question is,would it be selfish of me to make it so my best friend is the one who discovers my body? I would have documentation for him to read following his discovery,an I […]
Not kidding. Don’t hold back on what comes to mind when you see these pics:
I don’t know whether to cry or laugh. I’m so god damn done. I’m done with living and feeling like absolute shit.
Yet, I can’t even kill myself. Or cut myself. That used to be my escape and now it doesn’t help at all.
Today, I kept jerking the car, knowing my step father would feel pain. And I wanted him to. I wanted him to feel a fraction of what I feel everyday.
And my half sister wouldn’t just shut up. I screamed at her. And I would’ve kept screaming at her but my step dad told me to […]
Do you guys ever feel that cold sensation go through your entire body. It usually happens when I’m extra depressed.
I met up with my little brother in Victoria today. Fuckin’ cool meeting of the great minds. He’s been goin through some intense changes himself but im glad to see he’s pushing through and making necessary changes. Such a beautifully intense conversation about our current transformations. I’m finally embracing my trans identity and confronting and riding the emotions head on. Such a beautiful freedom. Scary as fuck as I fight my inner judgments and christian past. Fuck it. I feel it, I’m going to do it. Transgender is a fuckin’ gorgeous thing. Such a heavy burden to bear if filled with self hate and fear. […]
I’ve been sick my whole life… Ever since I was two years old I was sick. I was diagnosed with type one diabetes at the age of two, and it’s been hard for me to cope with my entire life… I was bullied during elementary school not only by students but also by teachers… And then I went to high school where I thought things would get better. They were basically the same but on a larger scale. I fell in love with a boy, I really fell in love. He was my everything and we were together for nearly two years… He left and […]
I hate my life. I hate being alone. I hate people. I hate my face and my body. I hate that I’m not brave enough to kill myself.
The most astounding fact is the knowledge that the atoms that comprise life on Earth, the atoms that make up the human body are traceable to the crucibles that cooked light elements into heavy elements in their core under extreme temperatures and pressures. These stars, the high mass ones among them went unstable in their later years, they collapsed and then exploded, scattering their enriched guts across the galaxy, guts made of carbon, ********, oxygen and all the fundamental ingredients of life itself. These ingredients become part of gas clouds that condense, collapse, form the next generation of solar systems, stars with orbiting planets, and […]
I’ve never wanted to kill myself more in my life.
I just feel like a giant roadblock in everyone’s way. My stress is tearing my body apart and we can’t afford insurance for medical care so that’s just another burden on my family. I feel like a waste of life and space and money and energy. I want to disappear. Run away. Die.
Just be out of the lives and out of the way of the ones I love.
After all, they’re going places and I’m not. I’m just dead weight.
I’m trans, asexual, panromantic, and dead tired. I’ve been diagnosed with depression a year ago, when I cut myself too deep, and my parents found out. I didn’t want them to find out. I wasn’t trying to get their attention. It was my private thing, my personal haven, and I wanted it to stay that way. But I was careless, had to get some stitches, and I was outed as not-actually-alright.
I feel absurdly tired allthe time. I basically stopped leaving my house since I finished school. I don’t have the energy to do anything at all. There’s nothing that I’d like to be doing pretty […]
I have recently been having some pretty intense nightmares, including waking dreams, which are the most horrific series of events, emotions, and imagery that persist after you wake up. The thing that makes these dreams so incredibly petrifying is the relief you would normally feel upon waking up is shattered by the persistence of the thing you fear the most appearing in reality. Sometimes they fizzle out quickly, alternatively there are times I lay in bed for over an hour trying to figure out my reality, it’s as if I completely dissociate from reality, and I am unable to distinguish things that clearly aren’t real […]