FUCK THE WORLD AND LET’S GET DRUNK.
Tag:
Booze
To whomever will listen,
2 years ago my mom passed away of an accidental overdose ever since then my life has been awful. Before my mom passed away it was crap, but it got worse. She past away when  i was in 7th grade it seems like yesterday. In 9th grade during a school break i was alone watching my neighbors house for her since she trusts me and she was away for the week. During the time she was gone my friend offered to get me fucked up i turned her down because i wasn’t ready to fuck up, but just a day later everything […]
Depression is killing me and its getting worst. Every morning i wake up defeated wishing i didnt wake up. Its hard to face the day without a drink or cutting into my thigh. I have no value to society i can honestly say everybody around me hates me i see the disgust in their faces counting the seconds till im gone. The only contact i have with people is being used to get drugs or take my money. I hate everything about myself my looks, personality and intelligences. I look at others thinking how great they are and how im practically invisible unnoticed maybe even […]
so some guy  told me to put my story up here and wait for reactions on it before i do anything.
why not.
here’s my fucked story:
i am Jeroen Steeman. i am currently 17 years old, and i live in a small village in the netherlands. my life is garbage.
i used to have a happy life tough. lots of friends i hung out with. two awesome older brothers. a happy mom and dad. then my mother got multiple scerose (that’s the dutch name for it anyway) and lost her shit. all the joy that once exsisted in our family life just got destroyed. both my brothers moved […]
A week leading up to my death, well that will be worth documenting. Next week my family is out of town, which means I will have plenty of time to die. So now I know the date, am I scared? No. Excited? Possibly, at least more so than scared. It feels kind of like planning a fun camping trip except I will not come back. Either way, planning is fun, or that could be my OCD, I don’t know. So what will my last day look like? Well I will wake up probably late and take plenty of time to rest. I will smoke a […]
Let’s say that you’re going to have a party. You’ve planned it out, know exactly how it’ll go. You’re excited; this is going to be the most perfect party that there ever was.
Then, the guests arrive. As soon as they arrive, they begin criticizing and demeaning their surroundings; the same surroundings you took so much time preparing and setting up for your perfect party. They don’t like the booze, the food you’ve provided, they disparage the music because half of the guests hate the genre you’re playing, and the other half just don’t care. Some of your guests think your sense of style is severely […]
I have been talking to a few close friends about this but not yet written it down, this site is a great idea, ive just joined and im looking forward to reading more-its somewhat refreshing to not only know others out there are feeling like ending their life but that interaction is also possible- which is important.
Im a mature student in my finial year of uni, i dont really drink or do drugs anymore, its taken me 8 years to get to this point as my teeneage years and general social circles are all based on booze.drinking was making me miserable, so i stopped or […]
Dear SP’ers,
Since I promised to my therapist I would not kill myself and suck it up for two months… have you guys got any tips? What can I do when I’m freaking out?
Things I do to cope:
call/text someone to get help/ distraction
cry the fuck out of myself
post something on SP
eat ( chocolate)
smoke
masturbate/ watch porn
cut, beat myself blabla..
sometimes: booze
I would like to have tips: I want to learn how to cope with shit a healthy way instead of fucking myself up even more…
Lots of Love,
Dawn
When you hang yourself while taking support for your feet and just let yourself hang you eventually go unconcious. I tried this and all i felt was my knees go weak and pretty severe pain in the head. How long does it take to pass out and does booze help much?
I feel like no one gives a shit about me. I’ve been attempting suicide since I was  12. I’m 18 now. I feel like I just can’t be happy, and like I should just end it. I’ve thought about killing myself everyday since seventh grade. At this point what I think is, if I’m going to kill myself, I’m going to do it right. I’ve really considered the method of hanging, booze, and lots of sleeping pills. All at once? To wait until the sleeping pills and the booze kick in a little before I pass out completely, and then hang myself? Is this […]
Well that is it. I skipped class today after just another shitty day without talking or knowing noone in this huge class of over 100 students and already by now everyone has study groups. After that moment something glitched in my brain and I simply did what I always do. Escape. So I took the first bus home. I was so pissed off at myself that I turned to the closest mall and told myself that I would not be a ***** any longer and go through with taking my life today..so I bought a six pack of ice cold Heinekens and a bottle of […]
Hi I’m 52 and increasingly I am thinking of suicide. I really cant see the point. Pushing yourself, achieving new goals just doesnt have any sense to me at this age.It’s not going to make me happier either. I have a degree a career that I dumped (It is enough to drive anyone barking mad -secondary teacher. too much political correctness.. Fucking awful kids of all races.) I’ve no family. I’ve a husband that is the nicest man I’ve met but never has any f’n money.coz he’s a latino immigrant. He doesnt want to do crime. That’s fair enough.
I frequently think I should […]
ive lost everything. My money, my friends, my family, my job. People keep telling me “oh you’re only 16 you’ve got your whole life ahead of you” but I know that’s total bs. Of those 16 years, I’ve been depressed for 6 and I’ve wanted to die for 4. I don’t want to see what life brings in 30 years. Because I already know what it’s gonna be like. Me miserable, alone, broke, probably homeless living off booze weed and ramen I cook using trash fires and a pot I stole from walmart. Trying to find a way to die but unable to actually do […]
Used to be a golden boy as a kid. Smart, witty, charming, and good at everything I put my heart into. Grew up with and angel for a mother, protective, affectionate, caring, and strong who always supported and provided for me and my brother being a single mother.
She had lost two husbands to death in her life. My dad being the second when I was 8.
Lived as a kid with undiagnosed adhd, which resulted in denial of authority at school getting into trouble due to lack of attention, interest and fooling around. I used make people laugh disturbing the class with my humour.
When I […]
it’s my birthday this friday, 26 I think. I’m 99% sure 26 but I don’t want to shatter the veil of ignorance I’m under by calculating it or trying to remember how old I’ll be. I remember rhyming about being 25 some time ago but that could have been 2 years ago.
Anyway, I’m moving today or tomorrow. My odyssey in my mothers jungle of an apartment is over, hopefully. I thought it was over once before but their were rats in the ceiling of the new place. I’ve gotta be sure to do another check at this current place I want, but it seems […]
I knew I was pregnant, at only 16 the morning sickness had made my day a living hell. No one knew, and I wasn’t old enough to buy Plan B. No one knew, not even my boyfriend. I’m sure my friend had figured it out. On top of having trouble in school with my severe A.D.D and having my mother threaten to kick me out, my abusive father, and having a rare form of Multiple Sclerosis (M.S) I was sure things couldn’t get much worse. So one night after everyone went to sleep.
I sat in the bathroom, watching the tub fill with steamy water. I was already drowsy from […]
This whole thing is just so confusing and depressing. Last month I spent 3 weeks in a psych ward. I was brought in handcuffs in an ambulance having swallowed 59 pills and downed a bottle of vodka. The doctors call it an episode. I cut my long hair to above my ears too before the police came. I guess I should fill you in: I had this episode around 2am one night near the end of Feburary. On top of the booze and pills, I cut my hair and was kicking things and throwing things at walls, screaming and making rediculous amounts of noise. I’m in […]