Well Hi again, many of you may remember me as BrooklynBoxx.. and once again I am asking you for your guys favor. I’m 15, as my of you know. But on January 26, 2013 I met and fell in love with a 21 year old. I know many of you may find this risky, coming from my past. But he was there after every failed suicide attempted. He got me to throw away razors. And talked me out of suicide. On the 15th of July my […]
Once I was happy,
Full of laughter and cheer,
So sometimes I wonder
How I ended up here.
Life just seems grim,
And I don’t want to try,
Everyday I go home,
I sit down and cry.
You made it worse,
Your  teasing and fun,
I was ready to give up,
And admit you had won.
But instead I pushed on,
Didn’t want to let go,
Didn’t want to give up.
But how could you know?
You didn’t know,
Because I wouldn’t talk,
Open-mouthed you’d stare,
As I struggled to walk.
No one would help,
But you couldn’t see.
Inside I was crying,
For you to help me.
But why should you notice?
Why should you care?
I bet you couldn’t tell,
If I vanished, into thin air.
You didn’t see,
How bad I […]
i think i want to quit dance. sure i love being consider “a good dancer” but this year isn’t like last. I’ve joined cheerleading this year and its really fun and so are the people! dance just doesn’t feel the same anymore, i wish i could go to the past and be happy. the truth is i feel really selfish i have alot more than some people have and i know i should be happy and myself but… im not! I dont even want to compete anymore. i just want to be happy again and cheer makes me feel like that i love trying to […]
I’ve been suicidal for two years, but during those two years I had reasons to keep going. Yeah, those reasons were few and far between, but they were there. I have virtually no reason to live anymore. I can’t drag people down. My friends – they don’t know about this. They didn’t much know about my self-harm (well, not purposely. If it was my choice they wouldn’t know at all), and they don’t know much about my ED. I find all of this, all of what I’m going though, humiliating. I’m not this person. I never was. I used to be so happy, and I […]
Right now you’re sitting in your room, all alone and feeling sad. There are a thousand things you know you could do that will cheer you up, but you can’t find the energy to do any of them. And so you just sit there and feel sad. You’d listen to music, but you know that won’t take your mind of things. Because the music you like has words and emotions, right now you can barely speak and can’t help feeling nothing but apathy for the world and everyone in it. Nothing matters and it’s all pretty meaningless. And then you’re suddenly thinking about the meaning […]
Today was actually ok, my dad didnt yell that much my mom was nice and everything went pretty smoothly…only probelm is tommorows monday amd get to see all the bitchy cheerlearders and other annoying assholes…i wish my friends understood, whemever i start to tell them they get this wierd arkward lookso i always end up making it into a joke and pretend it was nothing. Im tired if trying to conform into to someome im not..i dont even know who i anymore. From basicaly kindergarden i was the “wierd kid” the one who was always too mature, my mom used to call me an […]
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