I’m just going to get straight to the point. Does anybody know
whats most effective, partial suspension hanging or cutting major arteries on the arm? I dont want to be in a great deal of pain but i will be getting drunk and taking lots of benzos to make things easier. I’ve had over 11 years of pure torture and its time to end it.
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I have an appointment this afternoon with my therapist. Â Do I tell him that my suicidal thoughts are beginning to reoccur with greater frequency? Â For so long since I was hospitalized last year, I’ve been free of thoughts of killing myself.
I don’t want to go back into the hospital or into a residential mental health facility because I’ve admitted my depression is growing. Â I also don’t want to disappoint my family by relapsing.
This weekend my wife, my oldest daughter, and I visited my youngest daughter who’s away at college. Â I was very irritable, probably more so than at any time since I was treated. Irritability […]
I don’t know why I’m gettin so mad. It’s not like something to get mad at, it’s the smallest things that make me go off into a loud yelling or scream. I have so much anger and I dont know why.
I get mad at my mom, dad, sister, and especially my friends. I love my friends but I’m starting to hate everything about them. It’s like I want to punch them in the face everyday.
I just feel angry and depressed. So ANGRY…
I feel like the devil is inside of me and taking over my body creating so much hate. Theres just so many things in […]
I saw a therapist yesterday, to try to deal with my “issuesâ€.
I’ve decided to cancel future appointments because I just don’t see a point.
He asked me what my goals were, what I wanted from life, paint the ideal me.
There was nothing at all. No goals, no dreams, no wants, no future, no hope, no me.
Without something to aim for, I don’t see the point of going through this.
I guess in my remaining time I will see if I can find a reason.
But once the two people I can’t hurt are gone, I know I won’t be far behind.
Â
We listen to objectively vulgar, demeaning, and strange music. The lyrics hold meaning that are not widely accepted by society. To me, and I’m sure plenty of other teenagers, the lyrics hold a different meaning. Those who know serious emotional and psychological struggle see those lyrics as refreshing, and symbolizing an encouragement intended to help deal with the struggle. That’s how I see it, anyways. Opinions are like anuses.My generation astounds me, negatively and positively. They act out particular behaviors that are cliche for a teenager, but these “punks” are still human beings. They have the same brain every other human has; only teenager brain’s […]
So many doors.
Don’t know which way.
Nowhere to go.
Nowhere to stay.
I hear voices,
inside my head.
I hear things creeping
beside my bed.
They say i’m different.
They say i’m crazy.
I don’t do anything.
They think i’m lazy.
If hear voices
they give me shots.
Oh so much medication.
Pills? I take lots.
The people in my head,
they give me so much pain.
But now I know the truth.
I have gone insane.
In my home
I share with many,
each person has a room.
For there are always plenty.
We are all so different,
but yet we’re all the […]
I found out Thursday that my cousin ended his own life. The entire community is devastated. My father and Grandfather were both close to him. I have this guilt in me that is just all consuming. All I want to do is cry. A year ago, this could have been me. If I succeeded in killing myself, I would be the cause of more pain than I could ever deal with. I should have been a better family member, a better person. Maybe I could have done something, seen the signs, and now my entire family is feeling so much pain, and al I feel […]
I’m at the point where I feel like I’m only living so the people I’ve grown so attached to don’t have to deal with my death. Knowing I’d be missed does feel nice because not all people can feel that. But living for everyone but me is taking it’s toll. I’ve been thinking about suicide everyday for a couple months, each day its becomes more desirable. Even though I know I’ll be missed, I still feel alone. I don’t see my future going anywhere. And I’m okay with dying. But pain is what brought me to this point and my death would cause a lot […]
Today I told my mom pretty much that I hated her. We got into this big arguement about nothing. Then we got into another one and it was about my best friend/sisster. She told me I was hanging out with her too much and asked me if we were gay. I said ” You know what I’m getting tired of being accused of being gay. But I’m not and neither is she. Maybe she’s not old enough to be my mother but at least she’d treat me like a mother is supposed to because obviously you don’t give a shit about me. And if you […]
I found this website when I Googled ‘suicide starvation’. Some sick part of me wants to thank the people who’ve written about such topics, as I’ve never found a website that made me feel so secure before. Reading the stories and other bits on here has given me a new light to look to. One where I’m not as alone as I once believed to be.
I don’t have much else to say right now. Now’s not the time to share my story, and I’m doubtful of anyone wanting to be bothered with that anyway. It seems we all have our own problems to deal with […]
Life does suck day in and day out. That’s just how it goes. Unfortunately, (and I know I say that a lot) we don’t really have a lot of control over it. Shit happens and you may get depressed… You may cut. You may even think about taking your own life away just so you don’t have to deal with anymore of it. But think, that boyfriend or girlfriend who just cheated on you, that boss that just fired you, or those damn teenagers who bully you whether it’s all the time or just once, can always fuck off and get lost. Stay strong guys.
• I’m really annoyed, I can’t take this any longer I just can deal with another person telling me there problem when I have 10 billion of my own already , I was called fat today, and ignored flicked off and all this shit but that’s part of a new environment rigt ? Well I hate this new environment , everyone is way different from me, our cultures way different they’re high class I’m middle which to them , is low. And it’s like i literally moved into that one movie of highschool with the mean cheerleaders and weird shit but seriously what the fuck. […]
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