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find

my sisters… i need you

by disposablegrl 2/12/2015

written by disposablegrl

i’ve had many things taken from me throughout my life…

mother/father: robbed me of safety, acceptance, and unconditional love, i never stood a chance with the two of you

molester: robbed me of a childhood, feelings of worth and value

rapists: robbed me of dignity and pride

myself: robbed me of peace and tranquility

but you… nothing compares to what you have done… you stripped me bare, consumed me body and soul only to regurgitate it back in my face with a look of disgust only to say– not what i want… you leave me crumbled, a pile of used discarded remnants of something that was at some point […]

2/12/2015 4 comments

Nothing but confusion

by myownhero9422 2/11/2015

written by myownhero9422

To be completely honest, the thought of taking my own life is terrifying. I’ve thought of it a lot of times, but I can’t seem to find any other way out. I’m only 20 years old, for many life is just beginning, but for me it feels like there is nothing left ahead. I can’t continue in school, I can’t afford it even with scholarships and financial aid. I have other options but they all end in debt. My life at home is bad, my parents argue all the time. They never really listen to what I have to say. I get yelled at for […]

2/11/2015 1 comment

To Alek

by Pretend Girl 2/10/2015

written by Pretend Girl

I’m sorry you are going through a really hard time right now. I read what you say about your father and then, about how you are a bad guy. Can you see how your dad started that feeling and it is not your true self? We all do things that make us a “bad guy” of life. But in reality those bad things mean we were behaving badly and NOT that we are a bad guy. Please hear me when I say the fact you don’t like how you’ve acted is the start of a better Alek.

I hear your sorrow for being so sad and […]

2/10/2015 2 comments

Even Now

by Lalice 2/9/2015

written by Lalice

I yearned for death as a child and adolescent. I hurt myself relentlessly, but could never muster up the courage to actually end it. I’ve escaped the life that was forced on me, the people who hurt me, the person that I was because of it all, but I still find myself anxious for death. I will be driving and have to fight the impulse to let go of the wheel or to jerk it in the direction of oncoming traffic. I will allow myself to close my eyes when I am tired and attempt to fall asleep while I’m still driving. I will imagine […]

2/9/2015 2 comments

a few brief words on religion (dont worry sp admin, i aint fixin ta tell all thees heathens ta get rite wit jebus)

by cathy arsis 2/7/2015

written by cathy arsis

There is but one truly serious philosophical problem and that is suicide.

Albert Camus

I would rather live my life as if there is a God and die to find out there isn’t, than live as if there isn’t and to die to find out that there is.
nothing is more despicable than respect based on fear. (and nothing more deviant than those who only do nice thing bc they think that’s what god wants,so they can make it to heaven, not just bc it’s the right thing to do)
Suicide is man’s way of telling God, ‘You can’t fire […]

2/7/2015 3 comments

New years resolution…

by MysteriousCloud 2/4/2015

written by MysteriousCloud

I know it’s a bit late to start a new years resolution. But I decided the other day that I should start writing one or two good things that happen each day for a year and at the end read them all. Sounds like a good idea right? Sounds like it will make you notice the positive things in life, help become a more positive person. Not for me. It’s done exactly the opposite. I’ve realised what a miserable life I have, how cynical and negative I am. I can barely find a good thing that’s happened today and for me it was a busy […]

2/4/2015 1 comment

what the fuck

by contrast 2/4/2015

written by contrast

The people who live in this world are all pieces of shit and some are even worse than me. Wrost of all the majority can’t even see that their lives are worthless.

Life doesn’t have a meaning so they try their hard to find something to fullfil the fucking hole in the middle of their chests. And they think that’s OK.

I just don’t kill myself because I’m too afraid of what happens then. So I’ll have to fight for something I don’t want and see the world like a fucking rainbow and be HOPEFUL.

FUCK THIS SHIT.

2/4/2015 5 comments

loaded:-)

by jizmhead 1/30/2015

written by jizmhead

Everything is better to me after some Crown Royal, Doobs and whatever else. I hope that anyone that visits this site can find an escape from the pain and get through this! Every second that goes by we are closer to death (like it or not)!!! 🙂

1/30/2015 2 comments

The Otherside

by imperfectluck 1/29/2015

written by imperfectluck

During my darkest times in life, I had nothing to resort to but pain and misery, on the brink of ending it all looking down at the depths of it all and seeing peace and happiness once and for all. I thought I could never be saved and nearly killed myself 3 times but somehow I just wouldn’t die. I’ve been to an asylum, etc. talked to various shrinks but at the end of the day, none of it could help, only I could. That was 4 years ago during my junior year of high school when I was displaced from everything I knew of. […]

1/29/2015 2 comments

Nothing ends…

by LoveLost55 1/27/2015

written by LoveLost55

I feel nothing for anyone around me. Those that say they care, are more easily consumed by their own interests. I hate my life. I hate waking in the morning, the façade of a life I present to others, the happiness I show people daily, and, more so, not being able to sleep with my own thoughts at night. Why do I continue? Why keep up this farce of a life? Am I that weak? Can I not end this charade? I guess nothing ends….

I gather courage from pain. Each day, I put my uniform on, knowing I am hated. My only hope is to cross paths with a person that hates me […]

1/27/2015 9 comments

an unexamined life

by cathy arsis 1/27/2015

written by cathy arsis

The world can be changed in a fort night by a person with a strong conviction to do so.
where does one find the strength, i wonder, to be the arbiter of their own fate, and still find

the means nessacary to empart their brand of wisdom on humanity
I understand now that I never had a chance against these convicted people, because I
flock to folly, I just cant stand against the tide of human emotion,its all just to fucking much to feel.
I am a runaway in my own skin, I am making a concious and concerted effort to check out, I just don’t […]

1/27/2015 19 comments

exclusively for self mutilators

by cathy arsis 1/24/2015

written by cathy arsis

i decided to post this bc i see so many on this site burdened by this affliction, and this is something i have struggled with for years…there are cuts and burns on my thighs, shins, shoulders…my favorite is my right arm, i’m left handed…most of these wounds originated in my teen years, and although i’ve tappered off to a large extent, the urge still rears it’s ugly head from time to time…..the evidence of this dirty secret on my left arm are so numerous, and so obvious you can see them from outer space……this was never my intention, i suppose i am susceptible to over […]

1/24/2015 12 comments

Tonight is the night

by lostfather 1/23/2015

written by lostfather

Tonight after I get to see my kids I will end my life. I have bought them a gift that will always remind them of me and how much I love them. It is my time to go to end my pain. I love my children and hope they will understand as they are 9 and 10. My two daughters are and always will be my angles!

What I wouldn’t give to have a woman one time tell me she loves me before I go. All I ever wanted was to be loved and be a good father. May those that are here find peace in […]

1/23/2015 7 comments

Stress and School Projects

by piercetheflower 1/21/2015

written by piercetheflower

Hi there.

Today I am going to be talking about one of the most stressful things in my life, Expressions. I go to an arts school and to emphasize different types of arts they make it mandatory that we do something. My art is singing. There are several different categories of arts, including, but not limited to; music, visual, drama and creative writing.

Expressions is like a big talent show where the whole school, of almost 300 students, participates in a couple months of work. We showcase our talents and present them to the school. If we are good enough, we make it into Best of Expressions.

I […]

1/21/2015 0 comment

Days go by.

by Kitsune5567 1/20/2015

written by Kitsune5567

The railing looked so easy to smash my car is heaver then it can hold. These were the thoughts traveling through my head today as I skipped college classes to “run away fro my feelings” . This morning I found out my ex boyfriend already has a new boyfriend. he is thin pretty and motivated. I am none of these. I loved him for the two years we had so deeply only to be tossed asside when out of comfort with him i gained weight and just relaxed. He wanted to break up so badly but he wouldnt be “the bad guy” he would sit […]

1/20/2015 1 comment

I hate my fucking life

by stuckinukandlife 1/13/2015

written by stuckinukandlife

I’m so tired of this world and everything in it… I’m 36 years old, my mom has paranoid schizophraenia, my youngest brother was adopted out of my family due to that, my dad tried to kill me when I was young, I was molested for almost 8 years, and these are all of the things I have learned to accept.

No matter what I do in life, I feel like I am constantly starting over and constantly getting shit on. I give up everything I know, in my country and in my life, to move from the states to the UK to be with my wife […]

1/13/2015 14 comments

Feel like a nobody!

by babygirlmd15 1/13/2015

written by babygirlmd15

I feel like a nobody, and like a burden to the others who do care. I have no health insurance, and a wisdom tooth that needs to come out. Daily I am reminded by excruciating pain, that I need to have it removed. No dental surgeons in the area and even out of my area, are willing to do payment plans for me. My husband even offered to sell his play station to put a down payment onto the bill, and no go! I feel like […]

1/13/2015 0 comment

Not today but at end of month

by kittycat 1/9/2015

written by kittycat

Things are beyond hopeless. Things are ridiculous. Came to realizations too late in life. I’m almost 50 and just realized that my parents are self entitled critical narcissists who eroded my self esteem and that I spent 15 years with a spouse who is just like them. I have been the take it and put up with the bs – in every relationship and work place. Because why ? Because I settled and took the first boyfriend/job that comes along to get out of the debacle…the cycle has been continuous. Fast forward to now: I have no money and will run out of dog food […]

1/9/2015 7 comments

by scarsareforever 1/8/2015

written by scarsareforever

Starting my year as the chairperson of our student organisation. No time to think about suicide now. Besides, people need me.

Hopefully you, too, find meaning to your life! 🙂

1/8/2015 1 comment

I tend to wander off

by justme- 1/8/2015

written by justme-

But I always find my way back here somehow.

1/8/2015 1 comment

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