i hate being around people, even if its just me and one person. i like my bubble where i dont have to talk to any one i can just sit and go into my own little world and ignore everyone else or at least try to, but when someone is around its like “damn now i have to make awkward conversation with someone who probably wont like me anyway.” and dont get me in a crowd of people, fuck me ill have a complete mental brake down if i dont have my ear plugs. i cant wait until this is all over. Monday will come […]
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i cant
i dont see the point in why i even woke up today. haven’t been awake 30 minutes and already i feel like shit. get called a bum by my brothers boyfriend and of cores my brother thinks its funny. my next door neighbors are laughing at me while im crying saying “i hope she kills herself” while they are calling me a child molester with an std and thats probably the reason why im depressed, and my mother (who i love dearly) just thinks that i can flip a switch in my head that turns it all off and makes it stop. the only people […]
i wish could go back and do things over but i cant. its to late to much has happened, no one will help me. i had a chance and already it gets fucked up. if i could go back i would have done it differently, but its to late. god is laughing at me for sure now. i just hope i get to what i need to do before someone else dose they would make me suffer. im almost glad people think i have an std. im afraid to get tested because if i do and people find out i dont and if they get there […]
I cant take it i had enough i got a gun and tonight i blow my brains out. Everyday is the same shit and i cant take it !!
So good bye to this life and to being invisible !! I will finally be free and just sleep forever…
i was ok yesterday, then i woke up this morning. i wish i could go back and stay there. i dont care if i was in a bad place then i still felt good i didnt want to do anything bad. i really should not have been born. i was a mistake. i literally cant do anything without someone hating me for it, especially now. almost every person i come into contact with hates me. everyone talks about me behind my back but they never say anything to my face. i get fucked over all the time just because. for the past year ive had […]
i dont know what to do anymore, i say that alot because i dont. i want to give up but for some reason i cant. i cant move forward because there are so many things in the way, its like walking threw a brick wall. im stuck, and no matter what i do i cant be help because no one wants to. im alone. i think im in hell. is there an age where its inappropriate to cry, because when i do i eather piss people off or they start making fun of me. is that a bad thing now or is it just the […]
Why do i even try anymore . I am in pain i cant keep living like this. Overdosing on pills or hanging myself dont work at all!
I give up i can’t keep going on like this . I am invisible to the whole world and i cant take it anymore. I realy want to blow my brains out and just sleep forever !
So lets see if I can explain this i have attempted suicide so many times its become like an addiction. But ive always been saved cause ive always gotten afraid and get help after ive done something. I don’t want to live but im afraid to die.i can go half way through with suicide and take the pills i can stand on the bridge but i cant jump and i cant not call for help cause im afraid.
But lately the urge is there again and i have to do it failed attempt or not cause it’s like cutting if you don’t do it the […]
im basically word vomiting at this point so if this post jumps around a lot please bare with me.
ive been in a pretty big slump and i cant seem to get out, all i can think about is dying and what it would be like to die, and what people are going to think when i die, and what happens after i die. i made several plans to commit suicide and i just cant push myself to do it, im such a lazy piece of shit. i thought that maybe if i go back to school ill enjoy senior year so much that ill hang […]
Every now and then i think i should just remove myself from the lives of everyone i could possibly influence. Sometimes i think of ending my life, other times I think of disappearing.
I think im here for the anonymity of this forum. I dont talk to anyone about how i feel because that is useless. If they dont have the same feelings then they cant understand and i imagine i would be even more of a burden then.
I also dont want anyone to call a shrink because im “suicidal”. That wouldnt help… at all. Im not the guy who sits in a quiet […]
Im 26 and never had a girlfriend. I watched a lot of porn and become a sex-addict. I fucked over 300 prostitutes last 5 years and i cant stop with this, it makes me feel so numb. When is see couples walking around i feel so angry and envious.
Suicide is inevitable
Nobody knows what kind of hell i live in! People think im happy and ok… But im not! And so long as im in this hell… I will never be ok. Im sick and tired of crying… I just want it all to stop. I cant take anymore…
Nothing will change… No matter how hard i hope… No matter what i do… Nothing changes. And i cant take this anymore!!!!!
they’re taunting me. i cant sleep without dreaming of him. the way he touched me. god i miss it so much. ive been restless for a few days now. cant grt over him if all i do is dream about him. WHY???!? he has moved on or so i think so. ive moved on but im still stuck.
This year has probably been the worst year of my life.
I have suffered from anxiety since i was little, and i dont remember a time without it.
however, disregarding that, i feel like no matter how much i try to be happy, happiness turns against me, or life or the universe.
the beginning of this year was great, i had great friends, a loving boy friend, a loving family.
then after coming back from a (what i though was a) perfect holiday with my then boyfriend in june everything just turnt to crap, it has been a downward spiral.
My grandad fell ill and […]
You know if someone annoys you or you get in a fight? you can easily walk away from them right? or ignore them forever. But what if that person is yourself? you have no escape, youre stuck with yourself forever. and that scares me a lot.. like i cant just take a break from being around me.
I’m so tired of being me, of being myself and not being able to get away from this monster. I want to change everything about myself, i want to become a new person, a better person. But no matter how hard i try everything gets ruined again, and i have no energy left to try anymore. I just want to end everything but i know i cant and that makes things so much harder. I just wanted to get that out somewhere as i have no one to tell… I’m so ready to give up.
Hello whoever is reading this.
I hope your life, day, week, hasnt been shitty like some people on here. I know i shouldnt sound so selfish but god i cant take any of this anymore. Does anyone understand how hard it is looking in the mirror HATING what you see? because trust me i know the feeling. You look in the mirror and all your fears just get bottled up and thrown at you, right? I dont know if its just me, or society creating this image in my head of how i should look. I am 5’7 and weigh 128.2 pounds. i use to weigh […]
I have become so so depressed and I really do not know what else to do I know i can count on 2 of my friends to open up too and my mom and shit but still I feel so lonely,im also currently going througha break up after beinng woth my boufriend for the past 2 years and i cant even explain how empty i am without him, fulll of rage and hurt though i don’t show it often. My social abilities are so fucking weak and i hate it,and i hate how bad my anxiety is. It almost physically hurts, it feels as if […]
I feel like i should die. I just hate being around my family they kept taling me granted. They think i m just acting i m ill even afate doc said i cant be able to go clg bcz of spodalytis. My omly brother its a play fir me , he never get that i m still in pain i need his support they just avoid like i m nothing for them.
by Sampada
written by Sampada
its all my fault… hes at his breaking point and im sure hes goig to leave. tired of my bullshit. i got upset over the past trust is gone. heart is caving in knowing he must be dying. all my fault… he has a rage he cant control and might hurt himself or someone else. i always hurt the people around me. im a fuck up. now hes hurting and i cant fix it. all my fault… promised him i wouldnt cut and almost broke it. my fault… we’re both hurting becase i was being childish.ill take every hit from everyone who has hurt because […]