Welp, it’s been three years since the last time I visited this site. I’m in a pretty similar scenario too: feigning illness to get out of school and be alone at home, debating what my next action should be. It’s so frustrating that I keep feeling unsatisfied , like something is missing. I have friends, caring ones at that, good grades. Hell, I even have a girlfriend now, whether that’s for better or for worse. But I still struggle to feel attached or feel compassion for anything. Sure, in the moment I can forget about my desire to be wiped off this existence, but it […]
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I’m back
I always wanted to die …. I was told if I tired I would regret it and never do it again
Well I tried. I was hospitalized for 4 days and I’m back home. I still want to do it. I failed I didn’t succeed when I should have. The longer I go on living …. the more I hurt. I don’t want to do this anymore I don’t know what the point is. I have yet to have a purpose for staying yet I’m still here. Altough that may be a ‘sign’ I still don’t want to be here. Life is shit…. it doesn’t matter […]
Well, as you see: I’m back. In my last post I wrote that I had to take a break and I did. After that break of more than 2 weeks, I’m back again. But I have to say that I may not be very active at SP, because I’m feeling really worse. The last two weeks were kinda horrible. There happened too much to explain, it would be boring if I would tell it all (actually, this is a kind of excuse, because I can’t remember it ^^). My life nowadays is really though, I’m feeling like a huge mistake, worthless piece of trash. Feeling […]