I’m unhappy, I haven’t been diagnosed with depression, but I find that I’m easily depressed. The only moment of repose I feel is either when I’m asleep, (due to the fact that I do not dream, it’s just blackness and my worries fade away… until I wake up and find them again) and when I’m with my girlfriend (one of the few reasons I feel I can continue).) I get this uncomfortable, heavy feeling in my chest a lot when I’m sad and it makes me want to tear my heart out. I often am discouraged due to my lousy fast food job, my lack […]
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Issue One
Tonight is another one of those nights that I just really want to end my pain. It doesn’t help that it is gross outside… like gray and cold and shit. I am always affected by the weather… probably have that SAD Seasonal Affective Disorder thing.
I tried pulling myself out, by attempting to pretend that i am taking care of myself. I even bought groceries today, and I am chronic meal skipper. I got a haircut too, and I still feel the same. It is like I am trying to force myself to feel better, convince myself I am not a screw-up. Even though I know […]