The evil that is in the world almost always comes of ignorance, and good intentions may do as much harm as malevolence if they lack understanding.
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Im 28 and have suffered with depression for the past 12 years,i can’t blame a shitty childhood or lack of family support because that would be lie.i have a good job and friends who try to be a there for me buts its getting harder and harder to live behind this maskmask and when people say what do you have to feel down about the mask gets pulled tighter. I’m being crushed by the weight of my inability to get this monster out of my life.iv tryed all the usually stuff medication therapy not seems to work for longer than a few weeks,I’m now using […]
Hello all! I feel a dire need to express feelings normally hidden by my outwardly cheerful facade; I’m your average 90s kid, born ’87, and I’ve had my share of depression, tried to kill myself twice, both times I’m happy to say were unsuccessful (poison both times). But over time I matured learned to find ways to enjoy life, and save my death for a worthy cause. I think my decision to savor life has made someone very unhappy, I’ve felt there’s been people out to get me for a long time, although that wasn’t the cause of my depression it certainly weighed on me. […]
I was sure I loved him. It was something I’d never felt before. I lied to him as a defense mechanism and came clean not 24 hours later (not an excuse) and he broke up with me. This process took over 3 days for me to come forward, and his processing. I spent 3 days crying my eyes out and now I feel nothing. I’m not sad. I’m not crying. Nothing…I don’t feel loss. I feel….kinda happy. Can anyone give me a peice of logic or reality to hold onto? Is my brain/body just confused? I’m more distressed at my lack of emotion than I […]
Despair is repressed, only for a short-while, It cannot be hidden for too long. People start seeing it. It eagerly reveals its existence, like a child wanting to reveal his talents, in a school- play. Just like a play, despair is viewed as “fictitious”; in they’re mind, it’s only in your mind. Some believe it’s the lack of gratitude and love you show towards ’em; some, simply, enjoy your despair, it makes them feel better. In either case, their ego is the window in which, they view your despair. All this happens, as if they’ve never felt sad; as if they suddenly developed a relative […]
Sorry I know it’s bad but people asked me to post it so….
I have other poems too if you want to hear them. Thanks for helping me so far.
I’m down under ground
nobody can see
they don’t notice
my true identity
I’ve been buried alive
can’t come up from under
I’m seen as lightning
but really I’m thunder
My rage is trapped
down under with me
and under ground
is where it should be
If I come up
I’ll never be the same
when I’m looked at
you’ll only see pain
I like it down here
it’s calm and quiet
above it’s loud
and a disturbing riot
If I let go
and never come back
maybe I’ll find the identity
I still sadly lack
It would put a stop
to […]
Ever heard of MSM? It’s a dietary supplement, so it’s all natural. It enhances cell permeability and thus allows nutrients to flow more freely. It makes you feel a lot more energetic! Sleeping might be more difficult, but lol. Compared to the lack of motivation associated with depression, this makes me feel like I could do anything! Like woaaah. And it’s not a drug either, it’s naturally found in diet. It’s also called organic sulfur, and it’s in garlic, meat, chicken, eggs and milk and so on. It’s also available as pills and powders in health stores. The powder tastes awful. You should take it […]
It’s important to acknowledge that every person’s justification for suicide is valid and should be respected, whether your suicidal tendencies are a product of an abusive environment, deprivation of vital needs (such as social needs, romantic needs or the lack of care and appreciation from others), or financial complications, physical health impediments and decline, or even if your boyfriend/girlfriend/partner has left you or you stubbed your toe and that’s thrown you over the edge, every reason is valid. Suicide is entirely subjective and is construed in a different way by each individual. Humans are innately logical creatures, the only deviation from this is decided by […]
I… What do i want? What exactly is it that would like to do or pursue? I had the full complete chance of running away, but i stayed. I stayed because i knew what i wanted to seek can be sought anywhere and my running away, in that regard, is a hypocritical move. But now that i’ve stayed, even my seeking seems to have stopped. I couldn’t imagine my life without seeking, and now I’m living it. Or am i? I think deep down i still do crave for seeking. How to get fulfillment? What is it that will fulfill me? There must be something, […]
These are the main emotions I’m feeling right now as i desire to take my life away. I am a complete and utter failure and drug addict, I’ve manipulated and lied to those around me and the people who care for me, I really just want someone to kill me, atleast that way I can’t fail at suicide. I’m consistently troubled and shut down to anyone who tries to get close, I’ve failed at school twice, have no money to my name and just am at a lack of words now, I want it all to end now.
I went to a grief support group last night. It took me two weeks to find one that would take me. I live in a fairly large city (roughly 2 million), but yet every single place I called told me I didn’t belong there (except one.) I called hospitals, grief support groups, community mental health organizations, counselors (in fairness, they’d take me, at the tune of $90 and up and hour), and every referral service I could find on the internet. I even called suicide prevention, but they did not have any new names of organizations that I had not tried.
I explained the same thing […]
I don’t hate the ones in my life; I love them very much. That’s why I want to end my life, so I don’t mess up their lives any more. I know what a disappointment I am to them- really, their expectations are low, and I still can’t meet them. Not for wanting or trying, just lack of ability, I guess. Anyway, when I’m gone, something I look forward to probably 30 times a day, they can have fuller, better lives without me dragging them down. I’m not really needed, other than a paycheck, so not a lot to miss. I know this sounds like […]
i think it was the lack of sleep that sent me over…..the edge is not a quantitive thing that can be easily explained to those of whom have not been privy to the discomfort that comes with going over it….i had a ceasure and hurt my hip in the process i suppose, i was not concious for it so am therefor unsure…..i spent some time away but life has yet to leave, for which i am obliquely thankful, greatful even….
A little while ago, someone posted an experience about support (or lack thereof) with depression. I think the poster tried to tell their mom, and the response was something like “think more positively, you don’t have it bad at all,” etc. It occurs to me that other people, myself included, won’t tell family or friends about depression for fear of similar shit. Bottom line is, most people do not understand depression. Even a lot of depressed people are WTFing.
Even a lot of therapists, I’m told, have no idea what the hell to do. When it comes down to it, […]
Hey guys, I feel like I haven’t been on here in ages. I just spent my whole weekend founding an organization and building a website and social media pages for it. A lot of you know how difficult my life has been since my husband passed away last November. And it’s not been for lack of trying or anything, just lack of money and a support network.
Well, that being said, I founded the Young Widow Fund. There are oodles of younger women and men who have lost their spouses and have been left to just flounder due to circumstances that are out of their control. […]
The landscape was dry and dead. The roses that had grown in giant bushels were wilting and grey…the bee’s, once so full of life and sound, were silent and still…as were the other animals. The babbling brook that normally sang its cheerful melody in its beautiful voice had disappeared…leaving behind a trench of much and slime. The grass had turned brown from lack of rain and sunlight. The sky was over cased and dark, not one ray of sun had a hope of peeking through the dense clouds. The air was thick and hard to breath, it felt like it clung to your insides after […]
I honestly have nothing to fill all the hours of each day with. Unfortunately you can’t sleep 24 hours a day, I am actually jealous of coma patients some times. Its ridiculous to say that with all the millions of distractions that are so easily available. Yet its the truth, millions of books, video games, albums, movies, tv series etc available at the click of a mouse thanks to the internet. Plus all the social media and everything else the internet offers message boards chat rooms online classes. Well and of course all the fun things you could do out in the real world. Yet most […]
I don’t understand why some people are so comfortable in their own skin and others (like me) would give just about anything to climb out of my body and beat it to death with a stick? I mean right now, if I had the most gorgeous and intelligent female on the planet hitting on me or begging me for attention I would cower away because as lonely and touch-starved as I am I creep myself out.
The thing that makes this all so illogical is that when we are comfortable and confident with ourselves we actually attract other people regardless of how imperfect our physical presence […]
I know there are a few people who would miss me for a time, but in all honesty I’m not really apart of any ones life enough to warrant prolonged grief, I can imagine what it would be like for a little while people would ask where I am and someone would say “he killed himself” and they’d say “that’s so horrible he seemed so nice” and then they would change topic because they realise that they didn’t really know me, so few seem to.
Not that long ago my friend’s girlfriend was going on about what good friends we were and how she had […]
Hello, I have severe migraines and headaches- headaches daily, migraines every several months or so and they last for usually one to two or three weeks. I’m a fire Tech student but because of my migraine I haven’t been to class since two weeks ago. It hurts constantly and on top of that I dislocated my knee in class several weeks ago trying to advance a charged hose line.
At at this point everything hurts and becoming a firefighter seems to be looking less and less like a possibility. Today I’m likely to be kicked out of one of my classes for lack of attendance and […]