Tag:

Last Minute

“Look how dark it get, when ya marked with death”

by 1003 6/4/2013

written by 1003

Since I was the age of 15 (I’m 23 now) I have had various suicide attempts, each time either I fucked up at the last minute or the police intervene. I’ve been to psychologist, psychiatrist, specialists, councilors and been admitted to a mental health faculty. The past 3 years have been the hardest to cope with. I’ve tried getting help, but got nowhere. I get the feeling society wants me to kill myself (and I don’t blame it).

What shits me is that these attempts are quite life threatening, yet no-one has ever diagnosed me with a condition other than anxenity, but each time I’m talking […]

6/4/2013 1 comment

So here I am

by Rodders 3/19/2013

written by Rodders

I’ve never felt right on this earth. I’ve been depressed and made small attempts (self harm?) since primary school. I had a loving (if alcoholic and over controlling) mother who took her own life by car exhaust when I was 12. My sleep pattern got fucked, school work started slipping and I started cutting. I got close to a full attempt and chickened out at the last minute when I was 14. My dad was just really angry and refused to let me seek help. I had a grief counsellor, but I’m not sure […]

3/19/2013 1 comment

Stuck

by Jagger 3/8/2013

written by Jagger

So I have been fighting the urge to kill myself off and on for about 15 years now. Sometimes I lost and attempted suicide. So far I have tried twice, once when I was uncertain so it was a far cry from a real attempt, and once when I would have died had my neighbour not have found me. Problem is, I really do want to die but I don’t want to kill myself. I keep praying not to wake up and find myself full of rage when I wake up in the morning. I am so angry and depressed. I feel stuck, literally, we […]

3/8/2013 1 comment

Need Advice.

by Maria_A 1/28/2013

written by Maria_A

I’ve come to the realization that living with theseÂ suicidalÂ thoughts will probably never go away. This is my first time trying out an online community for suicide/depression or what have you because I feel I am running out of options. I feel I have no one who I can talk to in my life about these issues due to the deep shame that comes with them. Even though I feel I have a good support system, I don’t like feeling like I’mÂ burdeningÂ those I love with all this I go through on a daily basis.

Getting to the point, I’ve realized that I am too scared to actually […]

1/28/2013 12 comments

by raskolcp 1/4/2013

written by raskolcp

For ten years I’ve messed around with my brain.Â I was never happy and I’m still not.Â I’ve lost almost everything that matters.

Last night I woke up screaming. I was asleep, had JUST fallen asleep, and in my ‘dreams’ I was talking on the phone when I had a seizure. It felt so real. I fell forward, unable to reach the phone just staring at it. Finally I screamed. And that woke me up. This happens all the fucking time.

I laid there and I realized, the dreams really aren’t that bad. Even that terror that I feel at the last minute before the screaming wakes me, at […]

1/4/2013 6 comments

Will I ever stop needing to want to escape?

by psychout 6/20/2012

written by psychout

It’s been 37 years next week. Â 37 years old, and never had anyone say they loved me. Â My wife was the only relationship I had, and I got into it because I was fedup of not being in a relationship and she seemed to like somethings about me.

14 years later, I realise what I have is not love. Â I want a separation and I have told her, yet my friends who I have always been there for are telling me I should “stick it out”, or that I am being obstinate. Â Today I wanted to talk to someone, anyone, tell them how I feel, […]

6/20/2012 4 comments

Death date possibly moving up.

by U.N. Owen 4/4/2012

written by U.N. Owen

Probably getting our hours cut at work down to part time in the next few months.Â And my other job is laying me off.

Which means even less money on top of the salary cut last year.

And they are adding considerably more work and duties.

Not complaining but this place is just jacking us left and right.

Even though we exceeded paramaters for a year without a manager and six months without a direct supervisor.

Was trying to hang on until January of next year for my birthday but seems like it will be sometime this summer.

Guess I can take someone’s advice on here and get a credit card […]

4/4/2012 15 comments

My day…….

by Jamie-S11 1/18/2012

written by Jamie-S11

For anyone who read my earlier post about not getting into college, I got accepted because it was a mistake at their end. I thought my life had new meaning and purpose…… Oh how wrong I was. I haven’t felt this depressed and suicidal for months. I am so paranoid around all the other students. I don’t fit in. I probably could if I really tried but I’m a wimp. I’ve simply had enough. I’ve tried so many things to turn my life around and they all end up the same. I was extremely close to stepping in front of a car today but I […]

1/18/2012 1 comment

Need help

by maya 7/6/2009

written by maya

I’ve always been afraid to talk about my suicidle thoughts that haunted me for years and years back,afraid of considered a crazy pothetic person with no beliefes and courage.

My parents were divorced when I was only 7 years old,it was hurrable and i was forced not to see her or even mention her name or say”mamy”for example,it’s all because of my dad,I had no relatives,my sister and brothers were all I have,could’t communicate with anyone in a normal way..still I am that way..

I got married to a sick man and had 2 wounderfull boys and after 7 years of merrage i am fighting for divorce […]

7/6/2009 2 comments